Don't ask, don't tell - Relationship Thought Experiment

[Azurymber]

They're both problematic. The issue in that example is not being honest about your gender, the issue in the one you provided is not being honest about your age and occupation. They're all wrong. None of them are less wrong. Lying or misrepresenting yourself is never okay.

As to the reason - I don't know. The girl who did it to me said she was scared to come out as a lesbian and things just got out of hand. I'm not in these peoples heads.

Sure. But this post only focusing on gender and not the other 100 things people can lie about is what suggests it is transphobic or sexist.
The idea here isn't that people get upset over dishonesty.
It's that people get upset over gender specifically.

It would be different if the post was discussing how people lie about a multitude of things in online relationships.
But that isn't what it did. It focuses specifically on men "lying" about being girls.

As for your relationship, if the person introduced themselves as a guy, and seemed like a guy, there's probably a good chance that they weren't wholly cisgender, or they weren't sure how they identified. Again, the key issue there should be the dishonesty. Gender shouldn't be emphasized.