Tips on being a mentor but not sounding bossy

[Vandril]

I mean the way you put it here seems like you believe there is only one solution, but there isn't just one...there are many solutions even if others are not easily obtainable.

I think we're talking two different types of solutions, from the sound of it. I'm talking immediate, short term solutions, and it looks to me like you're talking extremely long term. As far as short term solutions to this problem go, there really is only one solution that I'm aware of: careful wording. As I said before, just about the only aspect of the problem we're in control of is the words we use and whether we use words at all; the latter avoids the problem entirely but doesn't really solve it. However, if you're talking playing the long game with openly advocating that people not jump the gun and make assumptions about people's intentions, then I completely agree with you. If enough people did so, in the long term, there would be changes.

When I say that careful wording is the only viable solution, I mean so within the scope of the thread. While a long term solution is valuable and should be pursued, it won't help now or anytime soon. Since the topic of the thread is how to be a mentor without sounding bossy, presumably to avoid causing a negative reaction from the person being helped, it's safe to say that a long term solution isn't what's being asked for. Outside a limited scope of time, though, the long term solution is the better.

Ideally, good mentors will follow through with both solutions.