First, I doubt anyone who'd be willing to give the majority of "toxic" (especially in that gap between how we seem to allow the term to be defined as a community here, vs. how it seems less liberally applied/smeared elsewhere) comments given here would be any less willing to give the same tenor and content of comments in similar situations in real life.
Im sure they would be willing.....problem is the consequences of what they are about to do would be very obvious. Screaming epithets and obscenities at someone in public usually has a less than desirable outcome.

Ill sum this up best way I can: my basic opposition to the idea of a dps meter is the fact it, as has been said, becomes an enabling mechanic for the kind of conduct we do not want to see replicated in FF 14.

Respect is earned, not bestowed. It isnt given out like lollies either. The concept of 'disrespect" goes both ways, as has been pointed out, you do x dps they scream and say they want you to do y they now want z and on and on and on until what we wind up with is a self defeating digital appendage waving contest.

This

DPS meters promote instrumental play over social play.
is the key element that has been overlooked. When you turn a game into a series of number crunching spreadsheets and an obsession with "optimal", social elements are discarded in their entirety.

A game should be a place where you log off relaxed, happy, having had an enjoyable experience...not even more wound up and stressed than when you sat down.