Sexual harassment

[QT_Melon]

I know I said I was done, but I can't help myself when people refuse to understand. Nothing you say on here will change the outcome of what happened in that article. No amount of discussion on the topic will. The only thing you can do here is try to work towards keeping it from happening again in the future. This isn't trying to "shift the goalpost" as you put it, everything I've said and even some things Rogatum has said is geared towards that end.

Ok, then strawman it is then.

[Joven]

44 pages and people are still going at it? Pretty sure everything that could have been said has been said, maybe it is time we let this thread die. The divide amongst those within this thread will not vanish, how we handle situations varies from person-to-person and because of that everyone will have differing views. Only thing we can do is treat others based around how we would wish to be treated.

I know, right? That's what I've been trying to say. I know I'm contributing to the problem by continuing to post, but as I said, I can't leave things well enough alone...

Ok, then strawman it is then.

Could you elaborate please? What exactly have I said that's a strawman? I think you're misconstruing the meaning of that term.

[Zsolen]

I don't like this assumption that everyone who is a victim made some colossally stupid mistake because honestly, it's not true, and it's definitely not that simple.

I never made that statement. What you think is victim blaming is not that at all. All you care about is forcing people to feel sorry for themselves for the rest of their lives, rather than actually helping them. Then you pretend to be the hero, even though you want to do nothing to actually help them get past it or help prevent future occurrences. If you give someone nudes, you are allowing yourself to be blackmailed.

Which leads me to what the other person said. Believing you can trust someone enough at some point to send them nudes is never a good idea. Ever. Do not even send your spouse nudes of yourself. That is not a smart thing to do.

You can't prevent everything, but blackmail is one of those things you can control to a very large degree.

[Elamys]

I never made that statement. What you think is victim blaming is not that at all. All you care about is forcing people to feel sorry for themselves for the rest of their lives, rather than actually helping them. Then you pretend to be the hero, even though you want to do nothing to actually help them get past it or help prevent future occurrences.

Wow. If that's the impression you got from my posts then I'm not sure that it's even worth discussing this topic with you ever.

Also, please join the year 2018. Sending nudes is neither illegal nor morally wrong. However, distributing nude photographs or videos that somebody has given you as a form of blackmail is both.

In short: There's extremely obvious merit to doing what you can to protect yourself but I'm far more interested in working against the people who actually did something illegal or highly immoral as opposed to the person who didn't. The victim already knows they could have done something different to prevent this, they don't need to hear it over and over and over again. Speaking as somebody who has experienced this, it's 100% not so simple, and I don't know how often people are going to need to repeat this. Abusers do not come at you with fangs, they come at you with smiles.

Again: Just because you can hurt someone doesn't mean you have to.

[Zsolen]

Please, stop putting words in my mouth. I don't think nude pictures are morally wrong. I know they can get people blackmailed. That's why you don't even send it to your spouse. I also never said people only attack with fangs. Why would I think people only attack with fangs, if I warned against sending nudes to people you deem trustworthy?

There is a legal system for a reason. There were many people, myself included, more interested in making sure things are done fairly. Pitchforks are never a good idea, even if the person is clearly guilty.

[Elamys]

Please, stop putting words in my mouth. I don't think nude pictures are morally wrong. I know they can get people blackmailed. That's why you don't even send it to your spouse. I also never said people only attack with fangs. Why would I think people only attack with fangs, if I warned against sending nudes to people you deem trustworthy?

There is a legal system for a reason. There were many people, myself included, more interested in making sure things are done fairly. Pitchforks are never a good idea, even if the person is clearly guilty.

It's not all about you. However, you still seem to be more concerned with somebody doing something that has zero wrong aspects to it than you are with the person actually doing something wrong.

[Zsolen]

It's not all about you. However, you still seem to be more concerned with somebody doing something that has zero wrong aspects to it than you are with the person actually doing something wrong.

When did I say it was about me?

I am concerned about preventing future occurrences, as should we all be. Justice, not revenge, it the way to go about punishing wrongdoers.

[Elamys]

I'm sorry but I really can't agree with the idea that people must stop doing something that is absolutely okay to do because other people are, to put it lightly, jerks.

[Paladinleeds]

I'm sorry but I really can't agree with the idea that people must stop doing something that is absolutely okay to do because other people are, to put it lightly, jerks.

While I can agree with taking steps to prevent something happening again, it also doesn't change the fact that those determined enough WILL find a way no matter how many trillions of precautions you take. So therefore, I agree the onus should be on dealing with those that do it. Though I will say the best thing to do is have lawyers involved, and get them thrown in prison.

[Zsolen]

I'm sorry but I really can't agree with the idea that people must stop doing something that is absolutely okay to do because other people are, to put it lightly, jerks.

Oh you can, but there is a significant chance it will land you in hot water. That's why you shouldn't.