Sexual harassment

[Rogatum]

Some may consider me a victim blamer since I am in the camp that assigns degrees of fault to nearly every action or in some cases inaction. As a society their is very little we can do to help victims of abuse if they do not come forward. Also it would make the jobs of those that investigate such issues more efficient if victims sought help sooner instead of sometimes years after the fact. I will not pretend to understand the about the emotional stress such an ordeal puts on a person, but waiting years in some cases to come forward due to fear of being judged or not believed does not make much sense to me. I am not sure what we can do as a society that fosters an environment that is welcoming to those that are victims of abuse.

At the core we need to educate people on what they can do to protect themselves in the most practicable way, but even with all the protections in the world if you indulge in an act one should understand that certain risks come with an action, and no one is immune from it. If one feels abused seek help ASAP, no matter how tough it will be, no matter how much others will judge you, and please do not let stories of people trying and nothing happening hinder you from seeking the help you need. No system is prefect we are all human and as such anything we do will always have flaws, but inaction does not help anyone or resolve the issue. Many might disagree with me, but I do not feel trying to get the mob on your side to shame and shun someone is not the proper way to go even if it may seem like the easiest.

First line of defense starts with you. If you are victim learn from it and try to ensure it does not happen. If this never happened be glad but do not think you are immune to it, learn from the stories of other victims and please protect yourself. Do not shut yourself off from online encounters, but understand every action comes with a risk weigh out those risks and make sure you are personally ready to handle such risks if they were to happen. I hope what I am saying makes sense, it was never my intent to be viewed as a victim blamer, am I just a firm believer in personally responsibility. Be smarter learn from others mistakes not only your own. We live in a world where a plethora of information is a google search away use it. I do not think we will ever be rid of any form of abuse or harassment, but we can mitigate through education and awareness.

[Jojoya]

First line of defense starts with you. If you are victim learn from it and try to ensure it does not happen.

How do you propose we do that when we have no control over what another person chooses to do and usually no foreknowledge that they intend to engage in the inappropriate behavior? Ignoring a harasser doesn't work. They're going to keep it up until they get the response they want. A restraining order will not stop them. Their victim moving will not stop them since they will continue to stalk their victim, nor should their victim have to make a life change when they are not the ones at fault.

Your attitude is the type that leads to violence because the victim has no other recourse since those like you are supporting the harasser's right to engage in that behavior by placing the blame on the victim.

You can google harassment cases all you want but the truth is nothing stops harassers from continuing in their behavior other than their conscious choice to stop, their removal from society via incarceration, their own death or the death of their victim.

What needs to happen is for parents and educators to teach children to respect personal boundaries and to understand that some behavior is never appropriate.