Apparently trying to help is being rude

[Bluevann]

I cannot find any nicest way to say this, but I have seen much nicer ways to phrase advice than yours.

The trick to give good advice is to repeat in your head what you intend to type, and ask yourself if that wouldn't offend you, were you in their position.

Wouldn't you be offended being told to change job because you won't do something that you think is wrong (since clearly, they thought your advice was wrong. Not saying it was, but it's what they believed)? I would be offended.

Always try to be in other people's shoes before typing your advice, and you'll walk out with a happy party and lots of commendations. It worked for me last night with a healer in Haukke HM.

The rules of thumb for giving advice, a sort of unwritten etiquette if we want to call it that is:
1: Don't give unasked advice, when what the person is doing is not causing failure. You cannot really compare a slower DPS to a healer who won't cure I or a paladin who won't flash, because those latter two lead to wipes, whereas the first case does only in rare situations such as endurance-based boss fights.

2: Never, ever, ever start the advice with an imperative tone, "you must" or "you should". "You could" or "Would you try and see if that's better?" are more friendly.

3: Most importantly, at the beginning of the advice, ALWAYS ALWAYS start with "<playername>, I hope this won't offend you, but...", or "Please, don't think I'm trying to be an ass, but.." or "Not to be rude, but I think you forgot Shield Oath." etc. Putting a ">_<" in there, as a "please-don't-hurt-me-I-mean-well." gives usually a positive impression too.

(Also, psst... a little secret... "cat grin (=3)" emoticons give a very annoying and irritating tone to the sentence they're put in. They actually pay people to make studies on this kind of stuff; crazy huh?)