Yes toxicity can happen everywere. I think ppl who say "FFXIV best community ever" have either very good experiences or just have seen worse. I don't think the game as the best community ever but it's not the worse.

Saying that the community is great is either copium or really pretentious (or arrogant idk the correct word and i'm lazy) or naive. Everyone can become toxic at some point, sometimes without even noticing it.

The passive-agressive way is not always the best one, often it's worse. Getting angry and actually showing it without using insults is not impossible it's actually easy : don't insult and say what you think that's all.

The fact that ppl use passive-agressive is just another proof that this community is not a place where everyone are nice and open minded. If that's not enough how about the eternal dj discussions about tanks not pulling enough? Glare spammers? Healers who don't dps? DPS who don't even know théorie rotation? Players not listening? Players failling several times? "You Don't pay my sub"? "Don't make me loose my Time"(alias "you don't pay my sub" 2.0)? Creepy players?

If that doesn't show that listening to ppl too fast is not a good idea, idk what will.