I feel your pain. I was on Excal and housing was something I really wanted. I also wanted airships and gardening! But, as those things are tied back to revenue streams for an FC, they're pretty well guarded and left to the upper echelons.
Before the new wards were added even getting a small plot on Excal was rough. Rather, it was impossible without many extra millions and a willingness to violate the EULA by buying it from another player. I also didn't have the patience to stalk the neighborhoods for a mere opportunity to find a house to buy. So, about a year ago I started looking around at other servers and noticed Mateus and Goblin had tons of plots just sitting there. Before the pricing adjustments a small, lower quality (4 / 5) plot, would run you just over 900k. So, I packed everything up, gave away a lot of gil to friends, and server transferred with my 1.2 mil (2 retainers) then bought myself a house in the Mist. It was a pretty awesome day! Once transferred I worked my way up to a large and also nabbed one for my FC.
All of that to say, it might be a strategy for SE's to keep player housing on populated servers limited in an effort to encourage migration to lesser populated server. That's pure speculation, of course. I imagine if every server had housing capped and players were willing to cancel their sub because of it we might see them heading down a different path. Mateus still has many, many (wouldn't surprise me if it were 100+) housing plots available! There are still a lot of players that just don't care about owning a house and prefer the apartments.
I'd guess that from a business perspective they'd need to invest in more resources (either development or hardware) to increase ward size and accommodate a very select group of subs. If the amount of subs they're losing (over not getting personal housing) isn't a large enough dent in net revenue to justify the expense of expanding the housing system why would SE do it? However, from a high level I can't imagine they see it the same way the player base on highly populated servers does. Just know, it frustrated the crap out of me too.
I agree with you, the OP, that housing should be available for everyone. It's a huge reason I log in as often as I do. Just know if you really want it, it's there. Sadly it'll mean a hefty sacrifice to get it right now. Should you have to? No, probably not. But there are good people on every server! Convince, coax, or otherwise coerce a core group of friends to transfer with you and take over a neighborhood while you still can!
p.s. Just think of how much easier getting to a hunt on time is when it's low pop... just don't expect to kill Odin at 1 AM on weeknight, about 6 people will show up now matter how much you shout
