I agree with OP to a certain degree. Lately, I've become huge fan of inspecting the tanks gear. Especially when I cue as BLM most tanks that I get in a dungeon with pull 5-6 mobs and even more than that and expect BLM to aoe so I naturally follow suit. Lately, I've been getting vote dismissed by a lot of lower ilevel tanks who get upset because I refuse to AOE and no amount of quelling strikes I use will keep the hate off of me even if I decided to level archer to required level to get that ability if I outgear you. More to the point, I do agree that as DPS we should know when and when not to AOE. However, sometimes, tanks should at least be mindful if a dps chooses or chooses not to AOE. Some DPS are lacking in the manpower needed for successful AOE rotations. In short, just take the time to ask people how to proceed through the dungeon before doing it. It usually works better that way in a long run.