Talk to me! [It is an online game]

[Mikita]

Perhaps not new ones but I've said manytimes my circle of frineds is a group of people some of which were in my old ffxi linkshell,some i met during 1.0. so some of these friends and connections go back almost 20 years. we've been to weddings, funerals, holidays together. 36 of us one new years party. and as I've said hundred of times. its those connections that often keep us playing. not the game itself. the game itself honestly isnt that good but good friends make it much enjoyable. often referred to xivas a cheap restaurant. crap food crap service, but with goodpeople can still have a great night..

In all those years though i cannot tell you how many people ive seen come and go and the social experience is often a big factor for why many new players don't stick around very long, because the social interactionis so shallow and makes it difficult for new players to make connections which is why so many drop the game.

I guess that's the effect of having built a theme park MMO.

Back in 1.0 it feels like we were forced to socialize and work together because it was really hard to progress by playing solo. You almost had to have a static just to get through the main story.
I still play with my old 1.0 group. We went through so much together like the frustration of trying to take down Batraal in Dzemael Darkhold back when it was actually hard to clear dungeons, or the joy of actually coming out of the Bowl of Embers alive together instead of a heap on the floor that other players standing around had to charity raise. I suspect Tanaka-san designed some of those systems intentionally, but that's not what much of the players wanted.

Since ARR I wonder if it's more limited to the optional raiding content for bonding through fire. Everything else is easy to just do on your own.

[Mikita]

Lack of communication because fear of getting banned.

Also I won't be talking to you in-game(get discord) because talking to you is a possible permanent risk against my account.

Genuine question: Why would you get banned for talking to people in game?

[Valkyrie_Lenneth]

Genuine question: Why would you get banned for talking to people in game?

Because people like to exaggerate and make it seem like saying hello will get you thrown in jail.

The amount of fearmongering over moderation in game is absolutely insane.

[Shialan]

Also, these people fearing to get banned for talking to someone in game are mostly these type of players who are passive-aggressive if something does not work like they want.

[Kewitt]

My parents told me not to talk to strangers as a kid.

[Nethereal]

Genuine question: Why would you get banned for talking to people in game?

Second-hand reporting.

You can have a good conversation with someone in public and anyone close enough to read what you typed can report you. I generally only talk to people in my fc/party.

Basically people getting offended for other people.

And you're more likely to get a strike than a ban, but they're permanent.

[Rein_eon_Osborne]

To the OP... don't forget that linkshells also exist

Going by personal experience, they are a perfect fit between the 'too small/antisocial'-party chat & the 'too crowded/noisy'-FC chat. We may not be able to see the online member list inside duties/instances, but we can still receive and send chats like FC chats, too. I always find it's a shame we can't use /tell in duties, and this perk of linkshell is a godsent to that matter The harder part would be finding the right linkshell or probably forming one on your own and invite friends that you think they will click really well with you.

[Naaura]

I met most of my FFXIV friends organically or me reeling them into the game from others mmos.

Usually it went like this for me.

1- Helpless damsel needs help with a quest
2- A rando helps me!
3- Yay! Happy times, I figured out how to do it!
4- We do small chat as I hang to the rando for future help
5- "Hey wanna join my FC? Theres more of us who can lend a hand."
6- ???
7- Got adopted by a FC and we became friends in my permanent home

Sadly I had to take a hiatus and since then everyone disappeared and only few in the FC were left I had no idea who they were and all my friend list had -name cannot be retrieved- for their names
This was before Discord was popular.

Now its easy for me to make friends in the Discord Data Centre servers. Most of my chat happens there and we meet up to play in-game!

[Vyrerus]

Best way to socialize in XIV and play the game at the same time is to do chill content like treasure maps/relic grind. Chat while moving or while in queue/while the roulette doors or wheel is spinning. There's time to talk, most people just don't capitalize on it.

Dungeons are different, though. Since they were robbed of difficulty circa 2.2 whenever they nerfed Pharos Sirius into the dust, they're seen more like a chore and really are more chore than challenge. People want them done quickly, preferably. Not a lot of areas to talk in.

Any friends you make, invite them to your favorite linkshell. That way you can talk to them across duties. FCs work too, but they are usually bad due to leaders having their own motive for recruitment/being too large such that most faces get lost in the crowd.

Also keep in mind that the larger the playerbase gets, the more the game sucks in people who don't normally play games to socialize. There's a ton of non-MMO mindset players that would prefer it if they could do the entire experience single player, as they aren't looking for friends at all. Generally, people who like games that are perceived as niche or whatever are more apt to be social. They have a lot in common already by just playing the same, niche game. FFXIV hasn't been that for quite some time, and it will likely never be that again.

You really gotta look if you want to find friends nowadays. You're more likely to run into people that you don't mesh with around every turn. And I agree with an earlier sentiment that the game's systems are not conducive to social interaction, at all. Make friends outside of battle content first, and then endeavor to do battle content with them.

[Caitlyn]

Just disable the whole chat like in Feast. Problem solved...