Why are standards seen as a crime in this game?

[Krotoan]

Those same people, if you criticize their actions because they don't understand basic game mechanics at pretty high levels if not max level itself, respond with insults, toxicity, "you don't pay my sub", "i'm new so i'm entitled to wiping raids because im learning", "i play how i want to", "you don't control my account" and so on.

And if you don't say anything to them, you get called a toxic elitist for choosing not to help them.

I have a feeling your criticisms are less than tactful. Just a feeling.
"i'm new so i'm entitled to wiping raids because im learning"?

I've never heard this, just "sorry I'm new".

If someone in a DF gives attitude or balks at trying to improve in the face of tactful, helpful criticism.. I leave or finish despite them. It's really not a huge deal. You can't control others, you can just do your best and offer helpful advice.