Listen. You aren't special.

SE's rules are a bit draconian, that's fair to argue. I could agree to a slow decline in punishment escalation after a year straight of clean behavior (not including time unsubbed). But countless times people like you who get slapped again and again deserve it. I've played the game for four years, I've seen my fair share of jerks and rude potty-mouths. Somehow I magically have no strikes against my account despite getting myself embroiled in stupid arguments like this with a very confrontational style.

Own your behavior. Don't blame other people for "making" you reply to their provocations like a kid. Impulse control is one of the many things you're supposed to learn as you grow up. And if you want security about not getting banned, here are some easy tips everyone should know when interacting with strangers in MMOs:

1. If you don't know the group, be cognizant that off-color jokes and language can get you in hot water. Get a feel for the vibe and the players before trying to make a slightly racist/sexist/homophobic/off-color joke (or just don't make them at all!)
2. Don't insult people directly even if they're instigating it by harassing you
3. Don't use swear words in heated conversation- a chat filter is no excuse to be vulgar
4. Don't submit false reports in retaliation
5. Don't troll/hinder the group if things aren't going your way. Just leave or ride it out and report at the end if necessary.

There, you will never have to worry about being banned again in every game ever. Even this one where you got yourself one step away from a permaban.