What is up with this toxic community

[Voltyblast]

Snip

While the message is "probably" about to strive to improve and learn, do you honestly think that self blaming for every mistake, even the ones you objectively don't commit, is the way to go? A tank should always learn from the mistakes, not just say "it's my fault" and move on, not whipping him/herself because of it. And this is a surprise because this is the quintessence of toxicity, yet they even dare to say that they are a friendly community?

Shougun said it for me really: it's fine if that's your way of thought, but don't you try to share it with others as it basically tells you that no matter the mistake you do, even made from others, it's always your fault regardless of what happened and that is objectively wrong. I do mistakes but you won't see me doing self inflicted punishment because of it and nobody should because, as you said, this is a game and should be enjoyed and not worked on.

And this deeply saddens me because people praise this game for having one of the best communities around, yet it also has one of the most elitistic mindsets I've ever seen in an mmorpg.

[TouchandFeel]

While the message is "probably" about to strive to improve and learn, do you honestly think that self blaming for every mistake, even the ones you objectively don't commit, is the way to go? A tank should always learn from the mistakes, not just say "it's my fault" and move on, not whipping him/herself because of it. And this is a surprise because this is the quintessence of toxicity!

Shougun said it for me really: it's fine if that's your way of thought, but don't you try to share it with others as it basically tells you that no matter the mistake you do, even made from others, it's always your fault regardless of what happened and that is objectively wrong. I do mistakes but you won't see me doing self inflicted punishment because of it and nobody should because, as you said, this is a game and should be enjoyed and not worked on.

And this deeply saddens me because people praise this game for having one of the best communities around, yet it also has one of the most elitistic mindsets I've ever seen in an mmorpg.

I'm not sure you understood what I said or if you read all of it.

I spoke to that exact point and said that people should not do that, in fact I repeated "people should not blame themselves for things outside their control, such as the actions of others" multiple times.

As I already said, you are not responsible for the actions of another, only your reaction to them.

Also, please read the last two paragraphs of my response to Shougun that was directly above yours as it outlines my feelings towards "responsibility" in a party.

[Shougun]

:3

TouchAndFeel is all over here like "lets get along, teamwork, good community, compromise/middle ground, I think they meant well, let's all have fun!"

NO! THIS THREAD IS ABOUT A TOXIC COMMUNITY, (┛✧Д✧))┛彡┻━┻ - I'M NOT GOING TO HAVE YOUR GOOD FEELINGS RUIN IT. ♥ lol

[TouchandFeel]

TouchAndFeel is all over here like "lets get along, teamwork, good community, compromise/middle ground, I think they meant well, let's all have fun!"

NO! THIS THREAD IS ABOUT A TOXIC COMMUNITY, (┛✧Д✧))┛彡┻━┻ - I'M NOT GOING TO HAVE YOUR GOOD FEELINGS RUIN IT. ♥ lol

How about I flip a little table, like maybe a kotatsu or cafe table. Is that a fair compromise?

[Shougun]

How about I flip a little table, like maybe a kotatsu or cafe table. Is that a fair compromise?

Yes I accept, but first let me light an eastern tree on fire while I play dead in the background so we get the right emotions in the room going. If I could make a side request that you do it in a subligar that'd be great~!

I've always felt if the community needs something to bond over we could just talk about how thankful we're not LoL .. XD. So far I've never been greeted in game by telling me that they're going to murder my family and chop me into little pieces, so hey I feel like FFXIV isn't that bad haha.. That game man, so scary lol (I've heard it's better but haven't played in ages so I'm not sure, and don't believe it :P).

[Voltyblast]

I'm not sure you understood what I said or if you read all of it.

I admit that I'm a little unfocused right now due to being quite late over here and having a killing headache (so I might even stop posting at all after this) but if anything I kinda think it's also time to move on. I think we debated on this "self-blaming" philosophy long enough and there's not much else to say: it's bad and self harming, but it's also quite spread around (it's not the first time someone thinks like this) and this is what in part makes this game have a toxic community, as these "mindsets" tend to create elitistic groups that only pretend to have the best of the best.

I mean let's not go too far: healers are mandatorily required to dps or they can be kicked - no two ways around it - and dps can be kicked for different playstyles (there's evidence that it's a possible reason for removal: http://forum.square-enix.com/ffxiv/t...=1#post4029187) which enforces a mandatory playstyle or "toodles". All of these fixed and mandatory rules makes the game toxic and the "always blame the tank" is just one of them.

If anything I don't even know how to fix this: I think it's also partially the game's fault that enforces such a tight and inflexible composition in their groups because of "meta" work and the game only rewards for using said meta - infact this is why Paladins are totally ignored. On top of that the game is mostly solo played - remember when you couldn't even do levelling roulette in group? - and the only moment where you group up for real, is when you do dungeons or raids. So not only this causes issues with bad players not having learned much, but it also tends to pretend people to have stellar execution or "kick".