You are not a fail.

[Sapphic]

My point is that a) the game should be played as intended, b) no one should be made to play in a way that they are uncomfortable with, and c) no one should be harassed because they do not meet the expectations of another for playing.

What if the party is uncomfortable with how you want to play? Aren't you doing exactly what you are accusing others of doing? Forcing your playstyle onto the rest of the party.