It's official Parsers are illegal in FFXIV

[Dhex]

Using third-party programs, parsers, or other tools to conduct actions players would not normally be able to do in the game.
No use of Parsers(defined as a program for parsing), or third-party programs. It can normally be done in game through testing dummies.
Point invalid.

I can do math and watch HP bars, buffs, and Enmity meters in game. I can already observe when mechanics outpace healing, or DPS. I can time and count in my head the gaps between abilities.

Your brain is a "parser" that should doing all those things (if you're actually playing).

A parser doesn't conduct actions for you; it just presents you with more easily interpreted data.