Everyone has their own experiences in this game, but all the drama of dungeon roles, healers dpsing (or not) and rotations are things I've ONLY ever seen in lower level dungeons with maybe a single exception I can recall.

It's a hard thing that I've had to tell my wife and newer players in FFXIV, that these elite weridos don't exist after you level up some. Something about a level 20 just thinks they know everything about how this game runs I don't get it... or these personalities quickly quit.

Long story short, wife just bought her levels in the shop. Best decision she ever made. None of the dungeons she's been in since has given her grief, and it's not because she got better.