It was not my intent to have the thread turn into large verse small pull thread. I will admit I did purposely deviate from the original premise since I did not want to seem like I was purposely alienating a certain portion of the community. Also, if my posts come off as me being upset that others may view me harshly or judge me negatively that is also not the case. The original purpose of the thread was to voice my stance and also gain an understanding as to why given certain circumstances people tend to react differently to what in my view is largely the same issue. I do understand that is it very difficult to change the actions or views of another human being. Though my goal was not mean to alter how someone feels per se towards the another person or to belittle or undermine how one possibly may react to a given situation, in this case being removed from a group.

Whatever one feels in that moment towards someone that has removed them is real, though my issue mostly stems from how one goes about it. I have seen cases in not just issues regarding groups, but on other topics be it housing, missing genders, hide glamor request to name a few. For some reason it seems that people tend to create negative image of a person that is often based around their own interruptation of the situation or comments made by the person. Which confuses me since I get what someone might feel is genuine anger or frustration towards being removed, but is right to use ones own feelings on the matter to come up with their own conclusions as to what the intent was behind the action? As you and others have mentioned one can tell another person how they should react and that was not my goal though I do see how I came off like that. What I wanted to come across was how we can only control and know for a fact how we personally feel unless the other party explicitly mentions why they did something. We have only our own personal inferences as to what happened, and I do not feel it is fair to frame others pr look at their actions under a self constructed lens so to speak since at that point we are looking at the case from a bias point of view.

Do not get me wrong, I am not saying people should not feel upset or however they do when removed. Though the genuine truth is unless someone states otherwise we have no real proof if an action was personal or not. We can infer to a degree, but even then it is difficult to say if the action was done with malicious intent.

Granted I still stand by what I said in the OP, though I should have framed it better since it is true generally even from my own personal experience most do not use their own limitations as a crutch be whatever they are, and most do try to raise above them when it is within their power and ability to do so. I have juggled with the idea to reword the OP, but I do not want to seem like I am back peddling. I stand by it, but my wording did make it seem like I was targeting certain groups simply for existing, and that was far from my intent.

When I create threads like this it is often because I wish to gain further understanding into reactions between people I do not funny understand or comprehend. I wish to understand them, as such I do often beat a dead horse and talking with me can be fairly frustrating since simple concepts like compassion and empathy by in large go over my head. So when people try to explain to me that is just how people are that further raises questions and perpetuate my curiosity.

Overall I guess this has less to do with the removal per se and more so why at the very least in situations like this, housing, missing gender, glamor hide option it is okay to frame the response of others in such a way that may create a negative image but fills in the missing pieces with their own interpretation instead of asking for clarity. I get in the removal case it is hard because who wants to go and ask their group hey why did you guys remove me. Though I still think that does not give the person the reason to use tbeir negative encounter to frame someone in an objectively negative way without knowing the facts. Just as I do not think it is fair to frame people who use ACT as horrible people or toxic just because they are using a tool.

I hope that clears up some things. I am not happy it became another size of pull thread I was trying hard to avoid it, but I also did not want to keep using my original cases cause I saw how that could been seen as targeting.