Entitled people kick from FC harassing after??

[AngelCheese77]

Sorry for taking a bit to respond. RL and all that.

So first ...

Well, here's two things:

1) False equivalence. Being in an FC is nothing close to having a job. Being in an FC has nowhere near the level of responsibilities placed on you that being at a job does, nor does it give actual monetary reward for fulfilling those responsibilities. A closer equivalence would be going to a coworker's place to play some D&D with their friends, actively making the game worse by having a good time at their expense, getting pulled aside and told to tone it down, before the rest of the players and the DM decide that they really don't want to play with you in their game, and not inviting you next time. Sure, it can be "bad form" for whatever that's worth, but maybe don't be an asshole in the first place. It's really not that hard.

Fair enough. So in your response, let's think of it in that way.

How many people here would NOT be upset if that happened to you? That you did something and your friend said "Hey man, look, can you just tone it down a bit? You were kinda acting like an a-hole and it wasn't cool" and both parties agree on that "warning" and everyone is cool. Then you go to your next DnD session and your friend stands in the door and is like "Hey man, look, I talked it over with the crew and their girlfriends and family, and like ... we don't want you in our DnD group anymore so ... bye" and shuts the door on you. No explanation, nothing else. Can you seriously tell me that just that part of the incident wouldn't confuse and anger you?

Like, for actuals, why are you guys trying to defend the obvious offenders here for being garbage people?

Oh I'm not defending anyone really. What I'm having is a discussion. A discussion is:

1: consideration of a question in open and usually informal debate
a heated political discussion
OR
2: a formal treatment of a topic in speech or writing
A discussion on the topic is included in the first chapter.

And usually discussions have opinions that aren't liked. And that's cool. But to come out and villainize those who have a differing opinion and see something differently is not helpful in any way. And that is what many here are doing to myself and Canadane who see it differently.

Upon further investigation, it was found that a warning was not the correct disciplinary action. Termination should have been the correct action taken. Employee is terminated.

I have seen this.

But we're comparing a job to a hobby. There's no reason Kalin or Yakoo or anyone needs to justify changing her mind about someone who was talking trash about her behind her back. Especially someone who was doing so while streaming, which means they were trashing their guild leader to complete strangers. Only thing I disagree with her on is that she didn't kick them immediately and tried to give them a second change, but that's because I have zero tolerance for people who can't be decent human beings. She sounds like she has more patience for that nonsense, which is not a bad thing.

Perhaps I wasn't clear enough and that's on me. I can have difficulty with that sometimes.

I'm not saying what the OP did wasn't "justified" in any way. What I am saying is how they went about it was "bad form".

1. They had already talked to the offenders, and an agreement was reached to give a warning.
2. The OP then spoke about the issue in a public forum (FC chat) where the OP then changed their decision for a warning to expulsion.
3. The OP then made a public post about the expulsion
4. The OP did not explain the reasoning for the change from warning to expulsion.

These four steps are bad form in their own right. These events then lead to the chain of events that followed. Am I saying it was a good idea for the expulsed players to act how they did? Nope. But can I sympathize with them because of how human emotions work? I think we all can in some way. I really want you all to think of any situation where you were told one thing, then something different another a day that had you upset.

Even if you were in a job and given a warning for something you did wrong, it can also evolve into a dismissal at any given time. If people cannot be good and decent to other people especially those in the FC that they are APART of or anyone for that matter, then they will be removed, if not right then and there, then fast enough rather than leaving it to grow into something even more problematic in future, because the ones who already did something already left their mark. As the leader of my FC, no one influences me to decide, not even my officers. I decide that for myself and the whole entirety of the FC and I will do what I think is best for my FC. My FC members and me included shouldn't put up with that kind of floaty BS.

Also, it takes real people to call their own friends out for their wrong doings, not standby them and say nothing at all.

I never called you a bad FC leader or a bad friend, so I apologize if anything in my post relayed that.

But as an outsider on a public forum, you need to understand that there will be people who were not there at the time that see things differently. And apparently I am one of them.

IN MY OPINION (caps so people see that) both sides could have done better. I hope this doesn't happen to you again in the future, and you enjoy the game.

[Sated]

How many people here would NOT be upset if that happened to you? That you did something and your friend said "Hey man, look, can you just tone it down a bit? You were kinda acting like an a-hole and it wasn't cool" and both parties agree on that "warning" and everyone is cool. Then you go to your next DnD session and your friend stands in the door and is like "Hey man, look, I talked it over with the crew and their girlfriends and family, and like ... we don't want you in our DnD group anymore so ... bye" and shuts the door on you. No explanation, nothing else. Can you seriously tell me that just that part of the incident wouldn't confuse and anger you?

The only thing in the example you gave that is confusing to me is that they are being turned down at the door, instead of told between visits to not come back.

If I find out my roommate had someone over who was harassing our cat I don't care if that person "got told to stop" or that they're "still on the calendar for next Saturday", they aren't welcome back. It's my space too and I don't want them here. That shouldn't be confusing for them.