What are the most common reasons people don't dps?

[RopeDrink]

I had been strictly taught in that previous mmo that healer should not dps

Then that is on the people you played with, not the MMO itself. There's this stigma going around that FFXIV is one of the few games where Healers are expected to go above their Healing station. The reality is that, even in vanilla WoW, you don't just pick a Druid/Priest/Shaman and only heal - they all had DPS tools and the same applies there which does here, ESPECIALLY in PvP if you wanted to be taken seriously - whether it was dispelling the enemy, crowd-controlling, or raw damage - you weren't just sitting there staring at health-bars all day. Hell, they've even revamped one of the class specializations to rotate entirely around damage a few expansions back. The difference is that, aside from Shadow Priest (inverse, seeing as it's a DPS, not a Healer), there was no obvious 'line' drawn, and DPS in general (to compensate) was always weaker. If you were a heal capable DPS, Healing was low and DPS was high - vice versa for DPS capable Healers. It did not mean "Oh, I'm a Healer, I only have to heal". The answer here in FFXIV is Cleric Stance, and the reason I love Healing in FFXIV is because, much like how it was for me during my decade of WoW, Healing/Utility/DPS role was my main choice there and it just fit like a glove, moreso here because there is no scale tipping drastically in one set direction depending on what class you play (ie. being a Healer doesn't mean you will forever hit like a wet noodle).


On topic, there are very few situations where I won't DPS, one of which happening as of 7minutes ago.

Enter dungeon (ExpRoul, Sohm), tank immediately runs off and pulls before I've even moved. Trust has now instantly been broken. Giving the benefit of the doubt just saw them doing it twice more, and even engaging a boss fight with me on 20% MP. Why was I that low? Because the tank seemed to think they'd do more damage than I could do if they were in tank stance ie. They were in DPS stance non-stop, eating tremendous damage, restricting me to pure-heals, not helped by the fact that our two little potato-DPS made a habit of eating every... single... skillshot... for the entirety of the run.

The whole run was so bad that I gave up mid-way to second boss and intentionally degraded myself into being the type of Healer you meet in <50 Roulette because there was zero trust and zero confidence that if I did swap to Cleric, that they wouldn't derp and force me to swap out 3 seconds later anyway, so there was no point - just spam that Cure II and get it over with.

I get this isn't the type of post/experience you are looking for, but there it is. Take it or leave it.