Deceased player statue

[AnnietheCat]

cut for length

Cemeteries also let it be known to hundreds(to maybe thousands) of strangers that someone is grieving. Seeing a funeral procession on a main road in your town lets you, a stranger, know that people are mourning a loss. You can choose to ignore them because they aren't meant for you, or you can complain about how their "public spectacle" is inappropriate. Which do most people choose to do? Everyone grieves in their own way, everyone has a right to grieve in their own way. And honestly, to commemorate a person that you cared for within a significant hobby of theirs would be an amazing way to remember them. For the people who loved them, they become a part of the game that they loved so much, and a world that they shared together. I think that's pretty flippin' awesome. Then again, I'm pretty flippin' sentimental like that. But we don't have to have similar tastes or mourn in similar ways. To be able to see how this could be a comfort to people doesn't require much in the way of empathy, and it isn't like every single player on each server will go one by one to read every single memorial. Everyone has their own lives. And even if it isn't for a real person, RPers would be able to use a headstone/memorial for IC things or for their characters to mourn NPCs. It's a very small thing, one that isn't mandatory, and one that would be appreciated by those who would use it.

[Neira]

Also cut for length.

I did say I liked and supported the idea of them adding a generic memorial for all players to use for any reason. The request should have stopped there.

[AnnietheCat]

I did say I liked and supported the idea of them adding a generic memorial for all players to use for any reason. The request should have stopped there.

But you did let it be known that you don't approve of the way some people choose to grieve since it's "making a spectacle of someone's passing", and it came off judgmental. I realize this is a soundless medium and it should be taken at face value, but a generic "memorial" isn't the same as the original request, which is for a way to commemorate a player. This was a request for something very, very specific and those who don't like the idea really didn't have to make judge-y comments about how people grieve or remember someone they cared about.

[Neira]

But you did let it be known that you don't approve of the way some people choose to grieve since it's "making a spectacle of someone's passing", and it came off judgmental. I realize this is a soundless medium and it should be taken at face value, but a generic "memorial" isn't the same as the original request, which is for a way to commemorate a player. This was a request for something very, very specific and those who don't like the idea really didn't have to make judge-y comments about how people grieve or remember someone they cared about.

People didn't need to bring such a personal request onto a public forum for a game developer with over 5,000,000(6m now?) copies sold. I'm not trying to say my post is any more appropriate than the original, but I don't believe it's any less appropriate either. This is a medium where we are (usually) allowed to voice our opinions, and I'm voicing mine. If it came off as judgmental, it's because of how strongly affected I am by this issue, but I am trying to keep my vitriol to a minimum.

Two to three months ago I was linked to a reddit post by people on my server, Diabolos, talking about someone on Hyperion who died. I just went through my history and double-checked, and it is indeed referencing the same person. I am sorry for anyone who is still grieving after a few months, and I've lost one person who made me feel that way as well. However, I don't really have any forgiveness for someone who is going out of their way to share personal misery with the rest of us.

The moment another person's grief becomes a grievance, inconvenience, or downer(lacked a better word, it's late for me) for those of us who haven't died yet or already been impacted by the loss, they have crossed a line. These individuals have personally crossed that line twice for me, and I bit my tongue the first time because it wasn't a repeat issue and it was on a very unofficial channel. But the second time, months later, compounded with the sheer audacity of asking for something so outrageous, is not acceptable to me.

I highly doubt that the individual who is no longer with us would enjoy knowing that others are being negatively impacted as a result of their passing, or knowing that the individuals they cared about are still hurting. But there is nothing positive to be gained from such a request here, it should have been sent through private channels or made neutral. If I was the type of person to contact moderators, I would have already asked for this topic to be locked or deleted, and I honestly doubt I would have met much resistance either.

I'm not the only person, on here or reddit, who has voiced my dislike of this topic, though I might be the only one to spend this much time elaborating on my views. This will be my last post on the topic though, as I'm pretty sure I've made my opinion and disapproval clear. If you or someone else wants to start a topic asking for a neutral memorial furnishing to be implemented for every player to utilize, I will gladly bump, like, and reply with approval to it. At this point though, I'm going to just let this topic drop.

[AnnietheCat]

Firstly, I could not possibly care less about the opinions of most redditors. Secondly, it isn't your place to decide what is or isn't appropriate. This isn't the first time something like this has been requested, in fact it's even been requested on the Japanese forums(it's the only other forum I can read or participate in). It's cool that you don't like it. But if seeing someone's personal memorial to someone they cared about causes you that much distress, I advise you to seek help. Real life does bleed over into the game; real people play these characters and real people go through real life situations. Families have ways to commemorate the deceased, and even their real life friends too. But you make friends in game, sometimes friends for life. Someone expressing their grief has nothing to do with you, and you treating like it does is self centered and arrogant. So again, if merely seeing a memorial like the one requested(which could be used for rp purposes and have nothing to do with real life), you have the problem, not the rest of us.

edit: also, with 6 million copies sold, what makes you the authority on this topic? You don't act like this when people are grieving publicly offline, so is it just online that bothers you? Because telling someone that their grieving is inconveniencing you by being a "downer" is a dick move and you cross a massive line when you do it. You don't have the right to tell people that how they grieve is inappropriate just because you don't want to see it. Personally, if they weren't my friends I'm callous enough to say I don't care. But I support the right to grieve someone you loved in a way that is healthy for you on an individual level. And AGAIN, the fact that RPers have been requesting this item for a long while now means that many people who /do/ want this item won't be using it for real people. How does any of that have a single thing to do with you? If it causes you distress to see it, don't look at it. Don't read it. If memorials IRL don't bother you, then ones in a video game shouldn't either. It's the same damn thing except one is bad on the environment(hint: it's the one in real life because it takes up space that could be used for other things).

[Whiteroom]

Firstly, I could not possibly care less about the opinions of most redditors. Secondly, it isn't your place to decide what is or isn't appropriate. This isn't the first time something like this has been requested, in fact it's even been requested on the Japanese forums(it's the only other forum I can read or participate in). It's cool that you don't like it. But if seeing someone's personal memorial to someone they cared about causes you that much distress, I advise you to seek help. Real life does bleed over into the game; real people play these characters and real people go through real life situations. Families have ways to commemorate the deceased, and even their real life friends too. But you make friends in game, sometimes friends for life. Someone expressing their grief has nothing to do with you, and you treating like it does is self centered and arrogant. So again, if merely seeing a memorial like the one requested(which could be used for rp purposes and have nothing to do with real life), you have the problem, not the rest of us.

Tbh, I would say your overly defensive reaction to what she posted is a problem. I mean really, you are trying to turn a thread with a request like this into an internet fight. Her post wasn't offensive in the least. It was an opinion that she is free to express on theses forum.

Just as the request can be submitted to show that some people want something, others can voice how they don't want a feature.

[AnnietheCat]

...

Since there is no method of downvoting, simply commenting with "I don't agree" would suffice. Instead, people intentionally came here being judgmental about the way people want to grieve. I don't agree with OP's request at all. I think a statue of a player is....a bit too gaudy. But to come here and be blatantly disrespectful and calling their grief "making a public spectacle of someone's passing" or to imply that they are in any way inconvenienced by the way a person grieves, which has jack shit to do with them, is ridiculous. I'm not being defensive, I'm being blunt. If they could do it, so can I. But asking for something like this is no different than real life public memorials to people, so either they need to figure out their problems with grief, or make a simple "I do not agree with this" statement and move on. That's it. That's all that was required, and yet, people chose to be down right rude. So yes, I'm aggravated, if that's what you mean by defensive.

[Elim]

I could see people using this feature to make statues of themselves for the kick of it. Not that that is necessarily a bad thing.

[crc0427]

It's really sad how vile some of you people are. Kindness doesn't hurt.

[Andrea]

It's really sad how vile some of you people are. Kindness doesn't hurt.

Since when is not agreeing with someone vile. As has been said there is no downvote button so the only way to say you disagree with something is to post.

Also to others, A simple "I dont agree" wouldn't be suffice. That adds nothing to the conversation. If everyone just said, I agree or disagree there is no way at all to improve on parts that those people disagree on.