...because that's kinda what "I want A to be like B" tends to mean?
It isn't 1:1 right now but is already VERY SIMILAR (as I've pointed out comparing WHM to WAR), and clearly that isn't good enough.
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The point I'm trying to make here is this is yet another canard. People saying "I want healers to be more like tanks" don't actually mean that. The reason that people have trouble reaching compromise and consensus - irl, in politics, in game design - is when people aren't being completely truthful/honest about what they want, or try to downplay what they want. For example, suppose you want healers to have DPS rotations like MNK or BLM. If you say "I want healers to have a rotation more like...tanks", then people might point out or make suggestions for ideas that are like WAR (a tank), which you will then reject/be dissatisfied with because...that wasn't what you wanted.
Sometimes - often, even, I think - when people do this, it's not being intentional duplicitous. It's kind of like that natural tendency people have to use hyperbole or exaggeration. It's true some people do so intentionally, but most it's probably subconscious to downplay what they really want because their mind thinks offering a "softer/more moderate" version is more palatable to people.
But the problem is, when other people are taking them as honest at face value and offering them what they're asking for, but it isn't what they actually want.
The first step, then, is to break out what people actually want by showing them what they're asking for...isn't what they actually are wanting. They actually want something else. So they need to say the things they really want. This does two important things. First, and most importantly, it means that compromises can be suggested that actually address what they really want. Secondarily, it can show in some cases when what they're asking for really isn't reasonable.
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As for your very last sentence: "Depends on who you ask."
100% why I push the 4 healers thing. Because there's not really a good way to address people that want different things in a game/system that doesn't have specs customization otherwise.