I hate raiding, I hate free companies

[Rein_eon_Osborne]

[...]Maybe people just don't take the initiative enough[...]

Honestly? It's plausible---I wouldn't say it's the only issue either, but if one never make the effort then they shouldn't be surprised nobody wants to stick around, because they don't even make the opportunities for themselves.

[Renalt]

Well, I know that feeling from other games. In every other game my guild/FC started doing other things like raiding, extreme farming and playing other games.
As long as they saw some advantage in me, they talked to me.
Was always the same shit, like, "Oh, could you make me some gear, weapons, etc.", "Could you lend me some money?", "Could you please do Dungeon XYZ so my character can level up faster?"
And stuff like that further.
The moment I said no, they moved on. I've always done so much for them, I've given them gear, weapons, jewelry, minions, mounts, houses...what I couldn't craft I've bought.
I even helped them level their characters. But when I asked for help, they all didn't have time.
I thought I'd never learn my lesson until I got to Final Fantasy 14...
I've never had a friend here, never had an FC, ignored all FC invites and will never join one.
Never helped anyone again, never added anyone to my friends list, never talked to players about me.
And I have no regrets. I come online when I want, I go offline when I want. When I Login there is no one bothering me with questions or stupid stories about his/her life.
Set your priorities and don't care about others. Then you won't be disappointed anymore.

I'm sorry but all of that just sounds really sad to me. Are you ok? I'm legit asking. Sounds like you've been hurt.

[VelKallor]

I come online when I want, I go offline when I want. When I Login there is no one bothering me with questions or stupid stories about his/her life. Set your priorities and don't care about others. Then you won't be disappointed anymore.

Yup. Do what suits YOU, and no one else.

Aneshda: I had a mate who was with an FC that literally HOUNDED him to rush MSQ so he could tank for their raid static. Three weeks later they got someone else and dumped him...now he is both bitter and furious that his catering to others cost him a game experience he had missed out on.

A lot of FCs are users, all you get is demands for help, but that is never reciprocated, "be a team player" "Its your job to help your FC mates'..yet when you need help, all of a sudden no one is available.

"Its an MMO you should WANT to socialise"..yeah, no, not after your trust has been abused over and over again.

"More and more prefer to be solo players"..yeah, they are, and I cant say as I blame them.

Pro tip: Maybe those who want others to "be social" should put more emphasis and more effort on being the kind of person people want to socialise WITH.

To be blunt, as far as this forum goes? I can count on the fingers of one hand the number of people I would NOT blacklist as soon as I saw them.

[Lieri]

Thats why I play solo. Yeah it feels weird at times because it doesnt feel like an MMO. However my experiences in FC have been meh at best. Not terrible but compared to other games, the guild (aka FC) in this game has no content to do. Even raids are meant to be done via PF and static. And the number one rule to keep your sanity and friendship alive is to not raid seriously with your friends. But raiding are serious contents otherwise it becomes a prison for your soul and time. So kinda contradictory...

They really need to add contents that can be completed weekly only with FC members. People that dont raid savage and ultimates need more contents to do. And I don't mean submersible. That adds nothing to the members and only make FC owners richer. Heck, even in those gacha mobile games they have guild events and theyre not a freaking MMO. They actually people to login together to complete a mission. Why cant XIV, an MMO do this?

[TaleraRistain]

what gives them the right to just leave me behind, never send me a message, not even a hi, and act like nothing happened..

Because it's their life and their game time and they can choose what they do with it? It's up to you to decide if your relationship fits what you consider friendship. But keep in mind everyone has their own idea of what friendship is. You have to either find those who share you viewpoint or find a group where you're all willing to compromise to stay friends.

I also feel like we're not getting the full story here. You mentioned that you left and joined your third FC and FC's discord multiple times. Don't you think that gave them the impression that you didn't really care to be there? I'm not going to lie. You sound kind of demanding and seem to think someone who calls you friend owes you all their time. But people don't work like that.

[Reinha]

Online friendships don't work out for everyone. Sometimes a game is just a game and nothing more. It was never meant to be a replacement for real life.

I've met lots of nice people, but they always seem to have other people/family/close friends as their priority. Which is fine. I can't expect a person I just met online to put me first and I'm lucky enough to have people in real life that do that. But if that's all that's out there, I'm not going to put anyone else first either. And I won't be used again. The things I do while I play are towards my own enjoyment and my help is conditional on receiving something in return. Zero with her bargains is relatable in that way.

[NekoMataMata]

We're playing a game with anti-social introverts who have social anxiety waiting for someone else who feels the exact same to take the first step. A lot of people also already have their core friends established and feel like they can't fit anymore within their lives. So you are reduced to being a game friend and nothing more. There's also the fact that people are very distrusting on the internet, cynical, and will often throw you away and under the bus at the first sign of any, what they deem creepy, dramatic, or problematic. I learned over the years that the more I reveal about myself to a person, the less they seem to want anything to do with me. Almost like staying shrouded in mystery keeps them hooked. You also need to be constantly positive, cause if you're negative for any which reason or vent, (especially if they think your problems are petty), they consider you a toxic person. People are super judgmental, and they fake being your friend just so you aren't a problem to them.

People on this game don't really want to involve any of their real personality anyways. I understand that people want to be safe about putting out personal details but a lot of people on here seem like they want to become their characters and forget the real world. Again, I don't expect or want dox level information. It's just weird to have someone being permanently in character even in the FC discord, even in channels like the music channel. When we get to the point where we can't even discuss music of all things then there's no way we could bond.

[Crustyman]

Don't you think that gave them the impression that you didn't really care to be there? I'm not going to lie. You sound kind of demanding and seem to think someone who calls you friend owes you all their time. But people don't work like that.

Yeah, I most likely gave them that impression. It was when a lot of the group went completely silent ign and in the discord. Though when they all came back to the game I wanted to rejoin them. Also one of the previous times I left was for a really stupid reason, the discord had an ARK survival server and I accidentally killed one of my friends new tames.

If you (or anyone) plays ark, what happened was, my friend had just tamed a griffin and I thought it would be a funny idea to use a lighting wyvern's breath attack to scare them. I thought that friendly fire was off, it was not. After that I left the fc and discord because I felt like they were gonna be pissed at me, though me and the friend ended up working things out.

In terms of sounding demanding I've kept these thoughts to myself for the longest time, I just wanted to share how I really felt. I wouldn't say what I said in the third part to any of them.

[Kaurhz]

IMO -- The game doesn't handle FCs well at all... It's just a social club more than it is anything else which is really sad, fellowships have about as much going for them as what actual FCs do.

I think the last time I did anything solid FC-wise was back in Heavensward.

[ThaCa]

Once you have played the game for a longer time, there isn't all that much left to do aside from the absurdly massive achievement grinds. I don't see people burning most of their days raiding unless it's Ultimate. If people go ham on Savage it is cleared fairly fast in comparison and then all they have is reclears once a week.

Most of the stuff is one and done, even though some take fairly long. There's no reason to run roulettes if you have all your tome gear pieces and Jobs at max level. There's no reason to do Gold Saucer or any other side activity once you have got the rewards and decent amount of the currency.