Well we disagree on that. And some of the other replies indisputably are personal attacks.
Mine, for how I've been playing the game since 2015.
I don't know what the "hardcore" players need: I don't have their perspective, and I'll do them the courtesy of not pretending I do. It would be nice if they returned that favor.
If I was ever "scared" of people having low HP, it was years ago.
These days, I'm just amused when, for example, a tank dies because he ran out of my range or LoS'd me in a W2W trash pull. It's all part of the fun, and how people learn.
Besides, in the immortal words of Vince Lombardi, "the best defense is a good offense." Like dead DPS, dead mobs do no damage. So if the tank dies in a W2W pull but all the mobs die too, as happened in a recent pub run with me on SCH and two decent RPRs on DPS, that seems a fair trade.
Maybe you need to pug more. There's nothing monotonous about running with tanks and/or DPS who don't know their kit, don't know the mechanics, or both. I don't even find it frustrating, because I don't have high expectations for pugging, and certainly don't expect a fast clear.