I'm sorry that Endwalker was such an unpleasant experience for you, and if that was your experience, then that was your experience. But the estimation/conclusion that Endwalker's narrative and themes are demonizing empathy, made Hydaelyn less maternal, villainized children, and/or that suffering/despair is a good thing that is "needed", I would have to protest and argue that is a grievous misunderstanding/misinterpretation of what Endwalker's story was/is doing.

I am not personally interested in getting into a detailed debate on the matter, so instead I will provide a link to another individual's essay on Endwalker's story and themes, which I think is a great breakdown and analysis of Endwalker's major narrative themes:

Endwalker, the Nature of Suffering, and the Buddhist Concept of Dukha