FWIW, the controller issue is likely an issue with Crossover (the system that wraps the Windows client to run on macOS); Codeweavers—the folks who write Crossover—just released Crossover v21 last month, and it included a number of fixes specifically relating to Xbox Elite Series 2, Xbox Series X, and Sony DualSense controllers. (Major fixes to Bluetooth connectivity issues, and minor ones to input mapping.)

So, hopefully the problem will go away whenever FFXIV bundles an update using the newer Crossover.