The bullying on these forums is concerning

[Awha]

Not trying to be mean or anything so I apologize if it comes off as such, but not reporting someone when they're obviously being offensive/threatening/etc. is kind of an indirect way of saying "This behavior is okay."

People aren't going to stop and think about whether they should act a certain way tbh. They'll act however they want to because it's a game and they never have to deal with anyone they're attacking irl (unless someone goes postal and stalks them but that's a whole other thing). So, if someone is being obviously hurtful towards people and threatening to party wipe till they get their way, it's kind of warranted that they get poked by a GM to be like "Hey yeah, can you not?" It might not change the behavior but it's better than letting the person think that what they did was okay since no one did anything about it.

I get what you are saying, but when I run into people like that I often just tend to forget about them. Why bother putting any extra effort to remember the actions and report said actions of a single ant.

[Misplaced_Marbles]

I get what you are saying, but when I run into people like that I often just tend to forget about them. Why bother putting any extra effort to remember the actions and report said actions of a single ant.

If they get banned, they might be inspired to some introspection. If not, then they will continue to do what they've been doing.

[Awha]

If they get banned, they might be inspired to some introspection. If not, then they will continue to do what they've been doing.

Working on a lot of “ifs” and it could go the other way, if they get banned it may emboldened them to do more. End of the day I have no control on the actions of another person, though I can control how someone’s actions effect me. Sure I may report someone for something if it got to me, but it does take a great deal for someone to get under my skin. I generally do not see much payoff in taking the time to report the actions of others. If others do cool, that is good on them.

[Violet_Galaxy]

Out of all the tags, why Mexico?

[ChazNatlo]

Can't quote a specific argument in the above thread, but regarding "report them or they won't learn their lesson" if they are being an awful person, all punishing them will achieve is to make them more careful about how they go about how being awful. Punitive reinforcement really only creates better psychopaths "I was only punished because that person was too thin skinned."

Much the same way as I tend to watch my language since I got a temp ban (I try not to be offensive, but I can be quite crass. I may have also told someone they were being a... err... donkey.)

That said, I don't have a proper solution, and ignoring the issue doesn't help either. The proper solution would be to show and reward good behaviour, but outside commendations, which are borderline useless, there really isn't a mechanism for that.

[Lateralus04]

If the vast majority of people you interact with are aholes, maybe the problem is you and time for some self reflection.

[Bacent]

replying to original post in thread

When you ask them not to, that just further fuels them. It's sad to say, but it's how some people work. They do need to tighten down a bit more on the forums as well. There are some things that people are quick to call 'bullying' when it's either someone showing tough love, or just flat out not agreeing to what someone else thinks.

One of the issues of a forum is the fact that there's no context, and sometimes people are quick to apply what they think if the context the other person is speaking, leading to people getting a bit hostile.

But if people are going out of their way to harass you, which I am seeing in this thread, your best bet is to report them any time they try to aggro you and just don't give them the time of day.

Also it doesn't hurt to ask a friend to look at stuff along side you/at what you're posting cause I've had friends before call me out for being too aggro as well. But to be totally blunt here, you don't have too thick a skin and like others have said maybe you should step back from the forums for a bit, you have taunted others before on the forums and with people seeing you do that, they want you to do it more and are willing to press all your buttons. It'll do you some good to take a step or two back I personally believe.

[ICountFrom0]

Nope. I've never reported anyone in-game, I was simply saying that saying things like that could get them reported, and even banned. Maybe they should think about potentially being 33% closer to being permad, before they bully someone. I am a very nice person.

I am not sur I count you as nice.

By not reporting them, you left them free to turn that outrage and hate on somebody else, while letting them think they are allowed and encouraged to do it.

[NanaWiloh]

[Rinhi]

I need to side with the Topic Creator despite whatever history he has, the bullying on here has gotten out of hand and it always seems to come from the same posters that tend to get away with a lot of their comments.

When you ask them not to, that just further fuels them. It's sad to say, but it's how some people work. They do need to tighten down a bit more on the forums as well. There are some things that people are quick to call 'bullying' when it's either someone showing tough love, or just flat out not agreeing to what someone else thinks.

One of the issues of a forum is the fact that there's no context, and sometimes people are quick to apply what they think if the context the other person is speaking, leading to people getting a bit hostile.

But if people are going out of their way to harass you, which I am seeing in this thread, your best bet is to report them any time they try to aggro you and just don't give them the time of day.

Also it doesn't hurt to ask a friend to look at stuff along side you/at what you're posting cause I've had friends before call me out for being too aggro as well. But to be totally blunt here, you don't have too thick a skin and like others have said maybe you should step back from the forums for a bit, you have taunted others before on the forums and with people seeing you do that, they want you to do it more and are willing to press all your buttons. It'll do you some good to take a step or two back I personally believe.

so in a sense, you're saying that people should stop calling trolls and drama seekers out? because that's what 90% of the so-called-bullies did, independently of each other
even now, with this thread active, the OP goes into other threads and thoroughly enjoys the victim complex he has created for himself, or, if we're generous, his complete lack of self-awareness and his abusive behaviour
https://forum.square-enix.com/ffxiv/...=1#post5581209

so again, you're asking people to just be okay with manipulative trolling when they have made inflammatory and very controversial posts and topics for half a decade because they say that the people who have enough of that behaviour bullies?
I'm very sure you people know what real bullying is, as you've either seen, experienced or read about it first hand - and this isn't it, not even cyberbullying because not a single person is going into threads to insult him or follow him in game to harass him - and yes, he said several people did just this, apparently

just look at beginning of his thread: drakonic straight up quoted multiple of damien's own posts and you can't tell me damien didn't realize it - yet he played along - even though some of these posts were aimed AT damien a DAY before. no one has a memory this bad, especially when that 'bullying' is supposedly affecting him so much
you're doing everyone that has ever gotten bullied or is still experiencing it a huge disservice by defending people like him