I pay for my bf's subscription but he won't listen to me. What should I do?

[Coletergeist]

Spank him, that's what I do and it works fine.

[znushu]

So I pay for my bf's subscription to get him into the game. He's new to MMOs so I decided to teach him the basics. He was really interested in tanking and started with Marauder. All was fine until he reached the first dungeon and couldn't hold aggro. At. All. So I told him to use Overpower but he doesn't want to do that and doesn't want to listen to me despite me clearing E5S on week 4. What should I do? Should I cancel his sub? I don't think I want to pay for his sub anymore after this.

It just sounds like your abit too controlling and overbearing. Let them learn and play by themselves, there is no need to cancel their sub or whatever as that's just going way to far.

[Nixxe]

Are you sure your boyfriend is not just another account made by you? Because at this point I wouldn't be surprised.

No, he goes to another Final Fantasy. You wouldn't know him.

[RTX3080]

I'm less than 100% sure this is actually an honest request for advice but I'll treat it as such.

The #1 important thing in a healthy relationship is honest, direct, clear, calm, and frequent communication. You need to use words and phrases that aren't "blaming" or "condemning" because the last thing you want is to turn calm into defensive and once one person is defensive it generally shuts down the entire discussion. I would suggest having the discussion at a neutral time, free from stress and distractions where you have plenty of time to be 1 on 1. It's also important to remember that in any discussion your partner's viewpoints is equally important to yours and you both need to take turns listening and speaking. Finding a solution that suits both of you equally is important and that solution isn't necessarily a compromise (often is) but can be something completely different than what either of you originally thought of.

I think it needs to be mostly educational from your end
1. His tank is low level and only has few skills for aggro. It will get better as he increases in level
2. He has lots of choices of classes/jobs but each class/job is really only meant to be played 1 way. You have a "rotation" or "priority list" (call it what you will) of abilities and there's no real variation. To be effective you need to use you skills properly, even when you don't like the skills.
3. There are other tank classes he can try.

Not every game is going to appeal to every person and the same is true for FF14. If he doesn't want to continue playing FF14, tell him you'll need to cancel the subscription to save money and then invest that time and money into something else you can do as a couple.

I told him to use Overpower but he told me he knows how to tank and I told him I cleared E5S on week 4 and he told me he didn't care and now he doesn't talk to me and is packing his bags sigh people don't treat raiders with respect these days

[RTX3080]

It just sounds like your abit too controlling and overbearing. Let them learn and play by themselves, there is no need to cancel their sub or whatever as that's just going way to far.

How is it controlling to tell him to use overpower?

[Oraros]

How is it controlling to tell him to use overpower?

You seem to be trying to overpower him

(get it?)

[Arngrim_Greyashe]

I'm less than 100% sure this is actually an honest request for advice but I'll treat it as such.

The #1 important thing in a healthy relationship is honest, direct, clear, calm, and frequent communication. You need to use words and phrases that aren't "blaming" or "condemning" because the last thing you want is to turn calm into defensive and once one person is defensive it generally shuts down the entire discussion. I would suggest having the discussion at a neutral time, free from stress and distractions where you have plenty of time to be 1 on 1. It's also important to remember that in any discussion your partner's viewpoints is equally important to yours and you both need to take turns listening and speaking. Finding a solution that suits both of you equally is important and that solution isn't necessarily a compromise (often is) but can be something completely different than what either of you originally thought of.

I think it needs to be mostly educational from your end
1. His tank is low level and only has few skills for aggro. It will get better as he increases in level
2. He has lots of choices of classes/jobs but each class/job is really only meant to be played 1 way. You have a "rotation" or "priority list" (call it what you will) of abilities and there's no real variation. To be effective you need to use you skills properly, even when you don't like the skills.
3. There are other tank classes he can try.

Not every game is going to appeal to every person and the same is true for FF14. If he doesn't want to continue playing FF14, tell him you'll need to cancel the subscription to save money and then invest that time and money into something else you can do as a couple.

This guy is a known troll. Don't spend too much time on his posts.

[Bsrking5]

Oh thats easy, dont let him get "it". He'll get better if he can't "smash". Maybe even lock up "it" until he does better. If you pay their sub, they should start acting like your sub. Make him wear his in-game outfit in IRL. You get the point.

Or you know, just be a better troll.

[EmmetOtter]

I told him to use Overpower but he told me he knows how to tank and I told him I cleared E5S on week 4 and he told me he didn't care and now he doesn't talk to me and is packing his bags sigh people don't treat raiders with respect these days

Well in that case... you got me.
I gave you the benefit of the doubt that it was a legit ask and clearly its not. Hey, if you ever find yourself in a serious romantic relationship years down the road perhaps you will remember the advice given on communication. It will certainly benefit you. Especially the part about honesty.

Best o' luck.

[RajNish]

Cook dinner, drink wine, watch TV shows. Or play chess. That's much better.