I'm gonna say something unpopular: I don't like to rush.

[Penthea]

I was one or those players, even IRL I scratch my head when people thank me for performing my role or doing my job. I do not get offended, but it does make sense to me in the slightest.

Oh yea I totally understand someone's logic when they say "why should I thank someone for something they should be doing?" but it's another thing altogether to get offended when someone does. That's just being spiteful for literally no good reason.

I don't expect to be thanked when I do a good job healing, but it's nice when it does happen. And I like when I see people do the same to others.

On tbe topic I do agree communication is key. Just at times it seems like a gamble and over time I have noticed that many seem to operate on the notion it is better to ask for forgiveness instead of permission. In the sense if tanking if the group forces it on the tank and it is successful pull and they still refuse to do larger pulls people will view them as being a bad, lazy, snowflake tank. Though if one asks they run the risk of them saying no without even trying to see if the group would falter.

It is a rough spot to be in at times.

Chances are if they say no things wouldn't turn out well anyway if you made that decision for them. At best you would annoy someone. At worst they or others will leave. Neither of those situations is good but obviously one is far worse than the other.

If a person wants something and nothing else is acceptable they should just leave if what they want is impossible whether due to the skill of the group or someone refusing to do something. Or alternatively vote kick. Either way someone not fitting in with what the group wants ends up leaving.

I'm a pretty easy going person but like everyone else there are limits to my patience. If I'm in a situation in which I'm expected to do something I think is unreasonable or what the group wants is something I refuse to give, I leave. I never leave silently though. Like for example if I come across a very undergeared tank who isn't very good that makes every pull a nightmare I say something like "bad gear and bad use of cds, you're making me work very hard for your shortcomings. Find another healer for this, I'm not dealing with it." and then I leave. No need for insults. Just say what's wrong, and go. It's a game. No one has to deal with other people's playstyles if they don't want to.

EDIT: just want to say that if I come across a bad tank with bad gear I do advise them to pull less or use their cds better, and if they refuse or simply cannot do it that's when I choose to leave the group.