I also don't really understand this "EX is for hardcore raiders only".
If anything EX has been getting easier and easier every expansion.

My static sadly only really is interested in Savage and thus we don't do EX but I got my first kill in just 3 hours with random PF pug. That was with several death and we never saw enrage.

I think most people don't even try it and just QQ about it because it has an EX tag. Go out there and join a practice run, you see that little box in the bottom left corner? Use it and talk to your party if there are things you're not sure off, watch a guide or if you prefere go in blind but join a PF that states that they are going in blind.
I have no idea how it's on the NA DC but here on Chaos EU (with Cerberus and Ragnarok being considered toxic elitist raid groups) There's an entire page of only the new EX trial with practice groups and several going in blind too.

Don't get discouraged, if there's a bad apple there is something called as a blacklist, use it. I've seen far more bad apples in casual & RP events then I did in EX PF groups.