Tales from Duty Finder: Some make you laugh, some make you cry. Let's vent.

[Callinon]

People seem to think communication is difficult. When I'm healing, if a tank is doing single packs, I'll generally tell them they're OK to pull more if they want to give it a shot. If as a tank, another party member keeps pulling and they're not comfortable with that, they can advise the party that they may be struggling with the larger pulls which is why they're keeping it smaller. Confidence issues / anxiety are quite common in DF, and sometimes just a tiny bit of communication is enough to put a person at ease and get them outisde their comfort zone.

So I've done that. I've asked dps not to pull extra packs because I'm already handling what I can handle (or what the healer can handle through direct observation)... more often than not I get told off for speaking up by the very same dps that was pulling extras in the first place.

Bear in mind you're making some assumptions here that, while they sound reasonable to you and me, aren't valid. The primary assumption being: the entire party is willing to listen. This is just categorically not the case. If someone has already decided to take it upon themselves to put extra pressure on the party, they've already made the decision that their time is more valuable than everybody else's and confirmation bias will prevent them from hearing anything that tells them they're wrong.

[CathariM]

Tank main here, yes the tank sets the pace, BUT they also have the responsibility to make sure that pace works for everyone in the group. Thats the double edged sword, some tanks seem to want all the authority of setting the pace without the responsibility of making sure that pace is appropriate. Healer look bored? Up the pace. Dps struggling to keep up? Slow the pace. Tanks say “I set the pace!” And thats true, but its only half the equation, and leaving it at that means you’re not doing the full job of a tank.

[tinythinker]

congrats on page 2500

[WrenElessedil]

Absolutely not.
The party decides the pace, not the tank.

I would also like to point out that if anyone uses the "You pull it, you tank it" rule out at any point as a way to control what the DPS are attacking then they need to get over themselves.

No one is obligated to take the hits for you and save you from getting your face smashed in just because you decided to pick a fight.

[Mavrias]

No one is obligated to take the hits for you and save you from getting your face smashed in just because you decided to pick a fight.

Bro, if you're not going to do the job you signed up for, why did you queue as tank?

[Skivvy]

Bear in mind you're making some assumptions here that, while they sound reasonable to you and me, aren't valid. The primary assumption being: the entire party is willing to listen. This is just categorically not the case. If someone has already decided to take it upon themselves to put extra pressure on the party, they've already made the decision that their time is more valuable than everybody else's and confirmation bias will prevent them from hearing anything that tells them they're wrong.

There's a reason I included the 2nd paragraph that you didn't quote. If they don't listen and continue in ways you don't like, you can always leave the instance. Or try to boot them. Or just accept what it is and finish the instance.

I'm definitely not under the assumption that everything will suddenly work out just because you asked nicely, but it never hurts to try. Quite often, especially with stories in this thread, it seems that no one even attempts to communicate before getting all uppity and turning vindictive.

[Ferwyn]

So, I get to finally post my first frustrating event. I joined a group for the daily levelling roulette, I get into it, and this DD pulled everything in the first room. I told this guy "If you pull it, you tank it". They all died, except me because I refused to tank it so was not in combat. I asked them to let me pull, I am new to the game and not ready for mass pulling.

Well, they respawned, I pulled one pack, and the same DD did the exact same thing. I just left after that.

It may seem like a jerk thing, but I never liked tanking something that an impatient DD pulls. Im not sure why it bothers me, its feels like "why am I even here?" but I cant explain the why.

[FirstnameLastname]

Because your fragile tank ego got scratched?

[Ferwyn]

Because your fragile tank ego got scratched?

No, because I am still learning and not familiar with the CDs, their timers and rotating them. After all, this is my first job I am levelling. I cant handle more than 2 packs at the moment. As I have said in my previous posts, I always give a warning that I am new and to be patient with me.

[Hash_Browns]

No, because I am still learning and not familiar with the CDs, their timers and rotating them. After all, this is my first job I am levelling. I cant handle more than 2 packs at the moment. As I have said in my previous posts, I always give a warning that I am new and to be patient with me.

Intentionally wiping your group because they pulled a pack of mobs is worse then dying because you aren't familiar with your job, my dude.