An alternative to parsing?

[Moogly]

I've said it before. It doesn't matter how polite you are. How nice and sugary you word it, or many many cute catgirl meme's with winks and thumbs up you post; people are abrasive when offered advice that they're not interested in hearing. If someone WANTS advice it's fine, but most people don't.

Well from my experience, I always tell people nicely, and it usually goes smoothly, I'd say, 80% of the time with green sprouts.
Only will mentor have a hard time accepting their errors - to a point where I don't even tell them anymore, except if they are tanking and not managing at all.
Oh, I had to tell you this too, but ever since I macroed (Protect) /pplease, I get instant protect every time healer forgets to, so catgirl winks work !
I really do think communication is essential.
And I emphasize on the point that you really need to pay attention on how things are said and who you're telling it to.
For example, if you start advising nicely someone, but then end with a tiny sarcastic note, it can break everything you've said.
This is part of my everyday irl work, that's why I can assure you this is true.

This is actually the literal definition of carried. Try not to get hung up on negative connotations and feelings and look at it objectively. If you do not have the necessary throughput the game dictates (barring the isolated examples of min ilvl beginning progression), then you did not do all of the mechanics right. You failed the DPS mechanic.

The thing is that in this case, I could say, if you fail to dodge one aoe, you were carried too...
If you died on the first clear, thus spent 90 second with the rez debuff and most likely failed the dps check, you were carried...
I remember someone criticizing me at the beginning of stormblood, after looking at my log of my first o1s clear, saying I was carried cause I didn't use a single holy spirit... By that time, I was so focused on mechs (and actually hated that new caster rotation...), I also remember our pug barely clearing it... But as MT that time, I really have a hard time understanding how I couldve been carried... I sure was well below average dps at that time (think I pulled something around 2.5K at that time), but as a MT, if I kept on failing and dying, I doubt our pug wouldve gotten its clear. I also remember, no one was above 4K when we cleared. I haven't done much savage raiding in ff, but from what I've done and heard around, dps checks aren't that bad.
That brings us to the fact that you also should take into account in which context you're playing.
Are you in a world first race ?
Then yes, any failure, be it dps check or fight mechanics, will make you a carried player.
But shall you apply those standards as common then 99% of the player base would be carried !
If any player not doing as good as the world first is carried, then next time I'll group, I'll be sure to do my carried player job to its best by jumping off the arena on pull !

I dont want to hurt anyone, but I actually feel like there's a lot of condescending feeling when people point out dps. Even though it may not be the case, that is how most people will feel.