It'll handle that the same way the PS3 did, via very aggressive LOD, animation scaling and additionally, resolution scaling as well. Compare the PS3 and Switch versions of LA Noire, it's really not an issue.
Precisely that. I can't stress enough how rubbish I am with gamepads =(
In all honesty, I'm surprised people seem to think that the Switch is so utterly incapable of handling this game. On the GPU side, the Tegra X1 in the switch sits roughly between the GTX 750 and the GT 730 (Which has a better core count, but also a significantly slower memory setup than even the Switch). The 730 struggles with certain sequences (SB's Alex transition is an easy example) due to it's slow memory but the 750 handles things very respectably on medium/high settings. With the inevitable axing of texture quality to get the storage requirements under control, 30 fps at 720-900p is well within grasp with the current game IMHO.
Where's the problem with that? It's not PC master race quality for sure, but it's perfectly respectable for that ~6" screen.
I had to spend a stint raiding in Midas via mobile tethering on a thin and light laptop no less. That's really no problem for anyone with 4G reception nowadays. (EDIT In Europe and Japan at least, NA Mobile operators are literally the devil, and all the internet in Aus appears to get eaten by Cockatoos and spiders)