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  1. #12801
    Player Mhaeric's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    Vancouver, BC
    Posts
    2,141
    Character
    Mhaeric Llystrom
    World
    Balmung
    Main Class
    Red Mage Lv 97
    Quote Originally Posted by tinythinker View Post
    Yeah to me a mentor crown ought to represent:

    1. Having played enough to know the basics of the game, but is not necessarily an expert at every job or instance or questline
    2. Wanting to help others and is willing to be patient with those still learning/returning (doesn't mean putting up with abuse though or outright demonstrations of apathy/refusal of effort)
    3. Willing to be an example, even if it means asking for help or patience in addition to offering it

    The mentors-are-@#$% horror stories tend to be fails mostly for #2, whereas the being-a-mentor-is-@#S% horror stories tend to come from others not understanding/agreeing with #1 and #3
    I had a mentor horror story that was the mentor tank being #2 to the point of over compensating. They straight up refused to participate in the morbol guildhest unless we completed it in exactly the way they lectured us to do it, but tried to make it seem like they were the one being altruistic and good-deed-doing. They said such gems as, "See how that didn't go well. Let's work together this time!" and "I'm sorry you're feeling angry, but everyone will be happy and we can get this done faster than just running in by doing it the way I say." after they literally stood there doing nothing when the bard ran in and pulled before they finished their long lecture on how to complete it the way they wanted to. They wasted so much of everybody's time with the wipe and ensuing 'discussion' and actually had the nerve to blame everyone else for it. Oh yeah, and nobody was a sprout. They were literally there just to lecture people about how to complete content, and force them to fail it if they didn't follow instructions.

    I've never blacklisted a person so fast before or since.
    (7)
    Last edited by Mhaeric; 11-12-2017 at 01:08 PM.

  2. #12802
    Player
    Kacho_Nacho's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2015
    Location
    Gridania
    Posts
    2,693
    Character
    Kacho Nacho
    World
    Coeurl
    Main Class
    White Mage Lv 99
    Quote Originally Posted by Meanken View Post
    This is completely unrelated to anything you wrote but as a Boy Scout, I fully approve of that signature of yours, love it.


    Quote Originally Posted by Gemina View Post
    Thank you Kacho I can always rely on you to help put back some of the encouragement that was lost from a bad experience. I would have no worries ever if you were my healer! Thanks to everyone. You guys have been so supportive!

    Anywho, I like to think that I have a good grip on tanking, but need more time, experience, and definitely cooperation from my party members to get better.
    Anytime, Gemina. Also, I would love to be your healer. At least for the ARR stuff. Not up to HW yet. I’m a pokey player with my “health challenges” affecting the amount of time I can play before I get too tired. But, if I ever have the honor to heal you, you’ll be getting my 110%. It’ll be a great time.
    (1)

  3. #12803
    Player
    tinythinker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Gridania
    Posts
    748
    Character
    Omi Senu
    World
    Faerie
    Main Class
    White Mage Lv 100
    Quote Originally Posted by Mhaeric View Post
    I had a mentor horror story that was the mentor tank being #2 to the point of over compensating. They straight up refused to participate in the morbol guildhest unless we completed it in exactly the way they lectured us to do it, but tried to make it seem like they were the one being altruistic and good-deed-doing. They said such gems as, "See how that didn't go well. Let's work together this time!" and "I'm sorry you're feeling angry, but everyone will be happy and we can get this done faster than just running in by doing it the way I say." after they literally stood there doing nothing when the bard ran in and pulled before they finished their long lecture on how to complete it the way they wanted to. They wasted so much of everybody's time with the wipe and ensuing 'discussion' and actually had the nerve to blame everyone else for it. Oh yeah, and nobody was a sprout. They were literally there just to lecture people about how to complete content, and force them to fail it if they didn't follow instructions.

    I've never blacklisted a person so fast before or since.
    Yeah passive-aggressive self-righteousness posing as tough-love caring blows. Had enough of that from certain religious types while growing up, agree with lightning black list.
    (1)
    Last edited by tinythinker; 11-12-2017 at 01:16 PM. Reason: edited for length
    Thanks for helping make the FFXIV community a fun and welcoming place. If you're not sure you have (and you very likely have), make it a point to be patient or helpful the next time you log in so that you can know you've made a difference.

    If you're on the Aether data center, congratulations! I might be your next exciting adventure healer in the Duty Finder. Please look forward to it.

  4. #12804
    Player
    Seryne's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Mist
    Posts
    598
    Character
    Dhembryda Frydwilfwyn
    World
    Coeurl
    Main Class
    Fisher Lv 100
    Not DF but PF. I've been farming Sephirot for the past few days to get saps. I joined a party yesterday as an AST and a SCH joined right after me. They asked me to go DPS instead because they claimed they could solo heal. It's an easy enough fight to solo heal unsynced so I went RDM to help with raises just in case. I really shouldn't have switched in retrospect. All they did was spam succor. I'm not even kidding. If anyone died they never bothered raising anyone so I had to sacrifice DPS just to raise people. I ran out of MP at one point raising people and then healing them because all this person was doing was spamming succor until they ran out of MP. If I died it was a wipe because they just didn't bother raising me or doing anything other than succor spamming. Then they had the nerve to rage at us because we wiped >:/
    (5)

  5. #12805
    Player
    tinythinker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Gridania
    Posts
    748
    Character
    Omi Senu
    World
    Faerie
    Main Class
    White Mage Lv 100
    Quote Originally Posted by Seryne View Post
    Not DF but PF. I've been farming Sephirot for the past few days to get saps. I joined a party yesterday as an AST and a SCH joined right after me. They asked me to go DPS instead because they claimed they could solo heal. It's an easy enough fight to solo heal unsynced so I went RDM to help with raises just in case. I really shouldn't have switched in retrospect. All they did was spam succor. I'm not even kidding. If anyone died they never bothered raising anyone so I had to sacrifice DPS just to raise people. I ran out of MP at one point raising people and then healing them because all this person was doing was spamming succor until they ran out of MP. If I died it was a wipe because they just didn't bother raising me or doing anything other than succor spamming. Then they had the nerve to rage at us because we wiped >:/
    Sorry for the frustration, but posts like this make me feel soooo much better about my own play as healer
    (2)
    Thanks for helping make the FFXIV community a fun and welcoming place. If you're not sure you have (and you very likely have), make it a point to be patient or helpful the next time you log in so that you can know you've made a difference.

    If you're on the Aether data center, congratulations! I might be your next exciting adventure healer in the Duty Finder. Please look forward to it.

  6. #12806
    Player
    Seryne's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Mist
    Posts
    598
    Character
    Dhembryda Frydwilfwyn
    World
    Coeurl
    Main Class
    Fisher Lv 100
    Quote Originally Posted by tinythinker View Post
    Sorry for the frustration, but posts like this make me feel soooo much better about my own play as healer
    Oh trust me I feel better about myself as a healer when I get stuck with people like that.
    (3)

  7. #12807
    Player
    SeriousxSarcasm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Ul'dah
    Posts
    427
    Character
    Mandar Magoo
    World
    Cactuar
    Main Class
    Botanist Lv 80
    Ever have those runs where it goes fine, but just the attitude around it makes you feel like crap? Had a Rabanastre run, wiped 3 times to the second boss, but the rest of it went fairly smoothly. I like to make small talk, keep a positive spin on things when I can (usually cuts down on the rage-quitting, ya know?). We were on second wipe, healers were doing pretty awesome with the fact that we were all lagging and had 3 newbies in the party (lots of death. So much death), and the convo went something like this:

    Healer: Well, our party had the most people standing at least.
    Me: lol, probably because of the healing and not our ability to dodge. XD
    Healer: b-tch I can't heal through one-shot mechanics.
    Me: ...
    SMN: The healing is fine.
    Me: ... I never said it wasn't? o.O

    And then dead silence for the rest of the run. The usual passive-aggressive you-get-ressed-last-or-not-at-all BS. Was so bloody uncomfortable. Like holy shite, can people chill tf out? Do they just see the word "healing" and shut their brains down for the rest of the sentence?? It's not the first time I've had someone freak out when I said they were doing good. Always healers! \o/ I know it's silly, but it's upsetting when you always go out of your way to be nice to people and then have them throw it in your face out of nowhere.
    (3)

  8. #12808
    Player MoroMurasaki's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Posts
    1,612
    Character
    Moro Murasaki
    World
    Zalera
    Main Class
    Red Mage Lv 80
    Quote Originally Posted by SeriousxSarcasm View Post
    Rabanastre with Healer McSaltypants
    While it doesn't excuse their behavior I do think the prevalence of this touchyness among healers specifically is born from the very real MMO addage of "Blame the Healer!" which is still alive and kicking. I have personally been blamed for not healing through oneshots before, even on WHM where I don't have shields to try to mitigate generally.

    That aside I had two runs of Rabanastre myself today, night and day really. The latter was almost exclusively positive, even little flubs like our tank running to the wrong add on Mateus (our NIN tanked our Azure Guard) and the SAM in our party eating like every AoE he could were made light of. No wipes, just a nice smooth run. I should note all but two DPS in our party were from our FC, we still were in DF with the rest of the alliance though.

    The earlier run I did with one DPS (that amazing NIN who tanked the Azure Guard later) and it was awful. People couldn't follow basic instructions, couldn't even make it to their own markers. I wound up leaving that run after the secomd or third wipe on Hashmal because it just wasn't getting any better. If that group cleared I would be incredibly surprised.

    Just goes to show you its all about your party - one person can't make or break a run like that but good people can make all the difference in the world.
    (2)

  9. #12809
    Player
    Iscah's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2017
    Posts
    14,070
    Character
    Aurelie Moonsong
    World
    Bismarck
    Main Class
    Summoner Lv 90
    A different dungeon experience as a low-level player: I'd only recently started playing dungeons, and for this instance was playing as an archer in Copperbell Mines - everyone in the group was new enough to have the sprout icon, and the second DPS dropped out very early so we were a three-person party for the rest of the dungeon.

    Maybe I was attacking too early, but the tank never seemed able to hold enemies' attention, so I was basically playing tank despite having no experience with the role and only having been through the dungeon a few times. Lots of running and dodging - stressful but also pretty satisfying when we made it through! Plus it inspired me to take up gladiator so I could have a better understanding of how tanking worked, and also how I needed to interact with it as a non-tank.
    (3)

  10. #12810
    Player
    SeriousxSarcasm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Ul'dah
    Posts
    427
    Character
    Mandar Magoo
    World
    Cactuar
    Main Class
    Botanist Lv 80
    Quote Originally Posted by MoroMurasaki View Post
    While it doesn't excuse their behavior I do think the prevalence of this touchyness among healers specifically is born from the very real MMO addage of "Blame the Healer!" which is still alive and kicking. snip
    yeah I do understand, which is why I usually try to say something if they're doing well lol. One of the least appreciated roles, especially in 24-man. I dont main healer myself, but I've done it enough to get shrieked at for other people's mistakes a couple times. It's just discouraging when you're actively trying to change that in your own little way and people just lash out, like jeebus fine, next time I'll keep my mouth shut and they can carry on with their hateful existence in peace.
    (0)

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