Warning about handing out wedding invites

[Naunet]

Not one person in this thread has defended them. They were idiots yes, but you can't take the fault away from the OP for not expecting something like it to happen. They're both to blame.

Bull. That's like asking someone, "What were you wearing?"

[Settiesama]

Bull. That's like asking someone, "What were you wearing?"

That doesn't make one bit of sense at all. We clearly stated that people like that very much exist, and is to be expected to get people like that if you just invite people at random. It's a huge chance that you will pick up trolls. No one ever defended them saying they were right in doing so. It's a completely different thing.

[Moonlite]

We invited randoms since we had lots of invites left since it fell on xmass day early. Everyone that came was really cool. We even had some new players that had never been to the zone. So we walked them to aetheryte and then to chapel.

It is a risk. But I wasn't to worried. Its not like you see them in the CS. For me the potential fun was out weighed by the potential trolls.

[Synrin]

There is a way to prevent harassment in the wedding; don't invite people you don't know. It is that simple.

That is the issue. Harassment should be prevented.

Bull. That's like asking someone, "What were you wearing?"

And that as well. So many people stating the obvious. Yeah, there are trolls, yeah they do mess things up for you. But that doesn't mean they should bring OP down all the damn time instead of giving actual useful feedback on the matter. There are risks for all sorts of things, it is just like FCs getting robbed and game masters not doing anything. It is a very very gray zone to meddle in, but sometimes inaction breeds nothing but more problems that can be prevented by both player awareness and SE's actions.

[Settiesama]

But again, you bring SE in again to 'take action'. SE has done nothing wrong here, the invites are meant to be for friends and trusted people. Like when you park your car in a parking lot, you take a ticket and leave it there. If anything happens to your car, it's down to you, not the people who own the parking lot. This is not down to SE to sort out.

It's nice that the OP wanted to be helpful, but the online world is not pretty when you just include anyone and everyone.

You also complain about not bringing in useful feedback, where exactly is yours? Your only suggestion is to add something that shouldn't even need to be a thing in the first place.

[Naunet]

Your only suggestion is to add something that shouldn't even need to be a thing in the first place.

Of course it should be a thing. Any time you have an instance that you can bring other people in, you should be able to remove them as well.

If you didn't understand my reference of "what were you wearing", I suggest you think about when that kind of question gets inappropriately asked of someone. Blaming the victim is never okay.

[Settiesama]

Of course it should be a thing. Any time you have an instance that you can bring other people in, you should be able to remove them as well.

If you didn't understand my reference of "what were you wearing", I suggest you think about when that kind of question gets inappropriately asked of someone. Blaming the victim is never okay.

This is hardly a case as serious as something like that. In this case, partial blame is on the 'victim' for not thinking ahead. Sure he was trying to be nice, but he should not of just assumed everyone would fall in line in an online game. Also, the idea of the invitations, as has been stated so many times, was always to be for friends, FC members, LS members, and people you know and trust who would turn up to your wedding, not for the reward, but for you and your partner, people who would actually care for the wedding and treat it with respect. It was never intended to just be given out like raffle tickets and have expectations that all the wide variety of attitudes and character would shift into the mold of the setting, especially when said raffle winners are usually only there for the minion and likely have no care for the Bride and Groom at all.

This is not an SE problem, and there should be no kick feature as there should be no one invited who would need it.

[Synrin]

But again, you bring SE in again to 'take action'. SE has done nothing wrong here, the invites are meant to be for friends and trusted people. Like when you park your car in a parking lot, you take a ticket and leave it there. If anything happens to your car, it's down to you, not the people who own the parking lot. This is not down to SE to sort out.

It's nice that the OP wanted to be helpful, but the online world is not pretty when you just include anyone and everyone.

You also complain about not bringing in useful feedback, where exactly is yours? Your only suggestion is to add something that shouldn't even need to be a thing in the first place.

SE is not only the parking law owner. They are THE LAW. They are the ones who set rules, and they are the ones who enforce the rules. So if your car does get stolen, SE is both the parking lot owner and the police, and that is why they should take action. Not necessarily in this case, but in the future, if it is possible to prevent trolls, why the heck not? Trolls disappear without a trace from these forums already. It doesn't even have to be a manual action taken by mods, rather a button. Like a vote kick for example.

Furthermore, any sort of feedback, apart from the backlash the community has given, is very welcome. More warnings, personal experiences, anything, but the tone this started with was awful. I don't complain, I am just trying to open eyes and points of view that so many people turn their blind eye to.

And I see the best contradiction was saved for last. '[To] add something that shouldn't even need to be a thing in the first place' - yes, it shouldn't even be a thing, because people should know how to behave and think about their actions. But as all of you were so keen and persistent in pointing out - they do not - and therefore it is, alas, needed. If we have an opportunity to stand up for people and a safe atmosphere in game and during events, why wouldn't we?

This is not an SE problem, and there should be no kick feature as there should be no one invited who would need it.

Resonable argument, but I have seen a fair share of green leafs coming for the experience and the minion. Point? The gesture was supposed to be a nice thing for those strangers, despite being perhaps a little bit naive.

[Miste]

The only one not to blame here is SE, who people are trying to pit the blame on by telling them to fix it

So...just to clarify...

If anyone makes a suggestion for a feature in FFXIV they are blaming SE?

Why? I don't get it.

Why is making a suggestion or request automatically blaming SE. Isn't it just a suggestion? Can we not suggest things? Feedback isn't a thing? Are you just mindlessly on the defense for SE here or something that you can't understand that making a suggestion isn't blaming?

I am okay with the Eternal Bond couple having the power to remove people from their own bonding if they want. I've seen some EBs where people only invited "friends" and some of these people they thought were "friends" (FC/LS) have been disruptive (not as bad as OP, but still). So I wouldn't mind if people had a choice to remove someone if they proved afterwards to be undeserving of an invite even if they were supposed to be friends. So I think it is a good suggestion.

OP's post is good. It is a warning that others not make that mistake since currently there is no way to remove guests who troll.

[Settiesama]

Why is making a suggestion or request automatically blaming SE. Isn't it just a suggestion? Can we not suggest things? Feedback isn't a thing? Are you just mindlessly on the defense for SE here or something that you can't understand that making a suggestion isn't blaming?.

Making suggestions is fine and all, but calling it a 'fix' suggests that the system is broken and SE would be the cause of said broken system, therefore puts them in a blaming situation.