Vote-Kicked from Pharos Sirus as healer

[Delorean]

I'm not berating him, I said he was a jerk ... and so did you, so we agree!

No, I didn't.

I was comparing the behavior of some endgame player who is so frustrated with the performance of lowly casual pleebs that they openly insult them to the behavior of more casual, less experienced players who take every bit of criticism that comes their way very personally.

Personally, I think they are just as bad as the people they set out to demonize.

People always get so upset over nothing in random matchmaking services and that is why it is easy to just chalk this up to nothing more than sensitive people being sensitive.

Just because someone can say something in a tone that literally begs the question "are you retarded?" and that is the tone that someone perceived a message in, does not mean that is the tone that the other person was using.

Do you know why our English language is so difficult to speak? Because there are so many ways that you can interpret our speech.

that was uncalled for.

in what world is it uncalled for to ask someone why they didn't do what they were asked to do and if they understand what they need to do?

i swear, i think some of you would melt and die if someone traded you guys a wailord named "YOURMOM" and it was holding a burn heal. you wouldn't even compliment the genius behind it, you would just be so mad about it and complain how socially unacceptable it is to talk about your mother that way.

if dude got kicked over anything, it was because the tank was upset that the healer let him die and was tired of just sitting there discussing strategy.

[JonBon]

Anyone who has been in a relationship, be it romantic or friend, should know the familiar saying. "It's not what you say, it's how you say it."
I'm just as helpful on my Tank as my Healer, but I am noticeably nicer about it as my Tank, and thus get much better results. The only reason I am nicer as my tank is because they have to stop and listen to me, they have no choice. As my healer I need to be quick, because the tank doesn't stop for me or anyone(normally) and that can come off as 'rude' since I don't have time for 'please and thank yous' or even smiley faces etc. But as my tank, I always add please and thanks yous, /cheer the team when they do well, and although the infromation itself I am giving is identical in both situations, I get 3 commendations almost every time I 4 man with my Tank, and my healer nearly never gets any, and people often don't listen to the healer either. It sucks to have to sugar coat things, but that is definitely just life.

[Worm]

Just because someone can say something in a tone that literally begs the question "are you retarded?" and that is the tone that someone perceived a message in, does not mean that is the tone that the other person was using.

If the only tone someone knows is contempt that is their problem, not the problem of people who interpret it as contempt. This guy goes into dungeons, gets really frustrated that they aren't speed runs, and that frustration seeps out into how he types. It's not an issue of 'the endless complexities of English language' it's an issue of getting pissed and treating people poorly.

Honestly I think guys like this shouldn't run duty finder, and especially should not run it regularly.

[Andevom]

So here's the likely situation:

The way you phrased things came off as aggressive to these players. Advice is appreciated, but it's all about the approach. Nevertheless, they overreacted by booting you out instead of talking things through. I'll grant you that.

But you overreacted a bit too and created a thread here, angry about them booting you out despite your good intentions.

Take the high road. So you got in a group you felt treated you poorly. It happens. Shrug it off, move on, queue up for another go. Don't let the behavior of a few random players ruin the game for you.

[HoneyBiscuit]

Why not? I'm bored. I personally feel like the tone taken in his text, assuming he was repeating what he said exactly, was demeaning. Like the difference between pointing at something and saying "Do it" or using an open handed gesture and asking, "Could you do it?" A good deal of people, especially towards a stranger they have no prior connection or ounce of respect for, will be generally offended by the directness of the pointing and command (not request). And I'd likely respond to that action with, "Who are you and why should I care?" And know that's not "who are you" as in "what's your name?" It's "who are you to me?" Saying, "Do Bards understand what their role is?" Would likely get from me the response of, "Does asshole want to stop pretending he's better than me?" Calling people by class name is impersonal and shows a disconnection between those people and yourself, as if you aren't all after the same goal. It is disrespectful whether you want to admit it or not. The only thing I'll give the OP, is that silence in such a situation is also disrespectful and frustrating, especially when trying to help. But to me, with that tone, you'd quickly prefer the silence. TL;DR mistakes were made on both ends, get over it. You were kicked from a group that will likely never form again. Suck it up.