A sign that I should just stop playing this game?

[Erana]

I know how you feel, helping people can be great and should be encouraged, but sometimes you have to put your foot down.

[Sfarzoso]

You're not alone ^^

[Keith_Dragoon]

I know exactly how you feel Kyah, I've gone above and beyond to help any and everyone in need but whenever I want to get something done for myself everything goes wrong as if I just became the greatest evil on Balmung. I had people snap at me, claim I am the worst person alive and much much more.

from the moment i log on to when i get off it's "Keith come help me xyz" "let's do x for my y" "come heal/tank/dd x". When I need that stuff I get ignored, denied or sour attitudes. I try to make everyone around me happy which recently has only caused me pain and stress. Was one of the reasons I left Hyperion aswell. Also hi, long time no see.

[Nakiamiie]

I believe you do the right thing by helping other players especially if you feel satisfied by it.

As for people not returning the favour, I'd say you've fallen in the hands of ungrateful players.
I'd recommend either making it clear to them that you expect some help back or just leave for another Free Company/Linkshell.
Don't feel bound to them, it is a game that you too are supposed to enjoy.

It's normal to feel emotions when dealing with other players, we are all still human players in the end.
But just like real life, there are jerks you have to learn to shield yourself from (emotionally).

Courage and enjoy!

[Yshnal]

I really know how you feel, but you must keep in mind that a lot of people out there are going to abuse your kindness if you let them, and that's not something that you're going to find just online, but in real life too. It's not your fault at all, but those person's because they lack real empathy, the same thing that makes you willing to help them and feel bad if you don't.

But don't let that discourage you from helping others; instead you should just try to learn to say "no" sometimes, as many have said. As long as you say it politely, they should understand, specially if they're friends. Otherwise they aren't worth your time, nor you should feel bad for it. You're a person with needs, and those needs are worth the same as theirs, even in an online game.

You'll always feel bad for not helping, no matter the circumstances, and that won't go away, unfortunately, as that's who you are and you shouldn't change. But you must learn to live with it, as it's worse if you just keep forcing yourself to always help or if you take to heart all the crap that some might tell you when you refuse (as you already know, I'm sure). Set yourself a limit, draw the line there, and always try to see if what they're asking from you is reasonable. Be confident in what you want, and don't let others tell you when or how you can do it. Also, we aren't in the same mood each day, so if one day you simply need to be by yourself simply say so. Be nice, but not a fool

I know all that because I'm a fool sometimes. But over time and with experience (some of it bad) I've learned to draw that line most of the time. You'll learn too, I'm sure :3

[Steeled]

I'm gonna pop some fortune cookie wisdom on you.

In this game, all games, and life, there are those that you help because they are your friends, but more frequently, there are those that are your friends because you help them.

I've seen many "Nice guy" players get outgeared by their pet newbies and suddenly the newbie has no more good for them. "What, your healer can't carry me through this? For shame!"

[AkashiXI]

I'm not sure if it's been said yet, but "I can't tell you the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to make everyone happy."

Give to others in healthy moderation. If they're too needy, either make it apparent or leave their company. I think 8pages of "I know how you feel" shows you're not alone.

[whoopeeragon]

I have nothing to add that other people haven't already said, but we are all behind nice people like you. I too do the same with helping mates out as well as PUGs, so I understand what you come into.

But I have to say one thing you did extraordinarily well.

You created one of the few topics where we can see a lot of the nice people come out and offer advice and be supportive of one another.

I congratulate you on that, and wish you the best in your endeavours.

[Zakalwe]

Just wanted to add that this is possibly the nicest, most friendly, most helpful thread I've seen on these forums. It renews my faith in the community (at least the small forum-posting subset of it).

[Fran636]

I think I may know how you feel, there have been numerous times where i've helped someone through a dungeon, primal, etc. and they don't even say thank you!!!!! I'm there healing my butt off and giving them tips >_>;;; Then there was one link shell member who needed help with ifrit, so I thought hell why not I mean I'm a healer so we should insta que. So I do around 4 Ifrit runs with him and then the next day he comes up with some bs conversation starter basically leading to another "can you help me with ifrit? " So I say ever so politely "awww sorry but i'm lvling carpenter atm but I can help you later if you want? " and I get back a "wow I give up, nice knowing you dude" and that was the last I heard of that mofo. So yes more often than not you help someone and they leech onto you, both in game and irl. So now that I'm keeping to myself (i've only got like 3 good friends on my server) I don't have to worry about helping anyone and getting leeched =).