Salted Flakes

[LianaThorne]

We got her the healer pants, and then suddenly she said she couldn't raid with us anymore. She left the static and started raiding with her boyfriend, sometimes. It was really weird. No explanation, just gone. Revolving door and PUG healers for the rest of the tier.

I found the reason you're looking for. If her bf isn't in your static/you don't have room for him then sorry, you're not going to win over him and odds are he wanted to start raiding with her. It's not being a flake, it's just wanting to be with her boyfriend lol. As sucky as it is, this is a game and not real life and not everyone is going to give you the answers you want because they don't have to in a virtual space.

[Vyrerus]

I found the reason you're looking for. If her bf isn't in your static/you don't have room for him then sorry, you're not going to win over him and odds are he wanted to start raiding with her. It's not being a flake, it's just wanting to be with her boyfriend lol. As sucky as it is, this is a game and not real life and not everyone is going to give you the answers you want because they don't have to in a virtual space.

I mean, sure. It'd be nice if that were the whole reason. But she was inconsistent in raiding with him too, and they eventually parted ways shortly there after.

My beef's not really with the fact that people have reasons they don't tell me. It's just, there's no courtesy. Not losing any sleep over it, but it's kinda memorable.

Waiting until raid time of raid day to tell someone that you're not raiding is flaking (whether it just be for that day or forever). Not showing up is flaking. The least people could do is give a heads up, or any simple courtesy such as, "Sorry all, decent group but I'm going to join my boyfriend's raid group." Also, it is real life. We're real people, playing a real game. I mean, we don't need to take it super seriously, but it does affect our lives.

I mean, I myself have flaked before. I was in a static from mid 2014 until early 2016, and in January of 2016 I got sick missed their raid time a few times, told them I was sick, but flaked on the last raid night before I went to Japan for three weeks. Raid lead literally sending me angry texts as I'm trying to find my hotel in Japan, and it was sad times for me. She told the static that I didn't want to raid with them anymore, and that they shouldn't be lenient with me for missing so much. They raided once, sometimes twice a week if everyone could make it. I was literally just too sick to stay up as late as I needed to make their time, and then I sorta tunnel visioned vacation prep for Japan. I told'em all that, and I wrote them an apology on their raiding board. I didn't have to do all that, but it was the least I could do.

This thread isn't really intended to be a pity party or a deep dissection about the whys. I'm just curious to see how similar my experience is to other people who have raided throughout the game's life. That's all.

[LianaThorne]

I mean, sure. It'd be nice if that were the whole reason. But she was inconsistent in raiding with him too, and they eventually parted ways shortly there after.

My beef's not really with the fact that people have reasons they don't tell me. It's just, there's no courtesy. Not losing any sleep over it, but it's kinda memorable.

Waiting until raid time of raid day to tell someone that you're not raiding is flaking (whether it just be for that day or forever). Not showing up is flaking. The least people could do is give a heads up, or any simple courtesy such as, "Sorry all, decent group but I'm going to join my boyfriend's raid group." Also, it is real life. We're real people, playing a real game. I mean, we don't need to take it super seriously, but it does affect our lives.

I mean, I myself have flaked before. I was in a static from mid 2014 until early 2016, and in January of 2016 I got sick missed their raid time a few times, told them I was sick, but flaked on the last raid night before I went to Japan for three weeks. Raid lead literally sending me angry texts as I'm trying to find my hotel in Japan, and it was sad times for me. She told the static that I didn't want to raid with them anymore, and that they shouldn't be lenient with me for missing so much. They raided once, sometimes twice a week if everyone could make it. I was literally just too sick to stay up as late as I needed to make their time, and then I sorta tunnel visioned vacation prep for Japan. I told'em all that, and I wrote them an apology on their raiding board. I didn't have to do all that, but it was the least I could do.

This thread isn't really intended to be a pity party or a deep dissection about the whys. I'm just curious to see how similar my experience is to other people who have raided throughout the game's life. That's all.

1. Getting sick isn't being a flake. Whoever told you that needs to chill out and stop to smell the roses once in a while. That's not a healthy mentality. People get sick and things happen that are out of their control and no one should be punished for that. This isn't a real life job and also why some statics have alternate players to take over if someone can't make it.

2. Correct, we are real people but this is a game. This is not real life outside of how we choose to control our character and the friendships we make along the way. I have issues separating from the game because I do view it as an extension of myself, but a lot of people don't look at it like that at the same time. People put on personas and fake who they are so it doesn't have to be real to them. There's nothing you or I or anyone can do about that. Just have to brush it off and move along onto the next thing. This is the internet, get ready to meet a lot of people who ultimately won't care about you or your feelings.

[Vyrerus]

1. Getting sick isn't being a flake. Whoever told you that needs to chill out and stop to smell the roses once in a while. That's not a healthy mentality. People get sick and things happen that are out of their control and no one should be punished for that. This isn't a real life job and also why some statics have alternate players to take over if someone can't make it.

2. Correct, we are real people but this is a game. This is not real life outside of how we choose to control our character and the friendships we make along the way. I have issues separating from the game because I do view it as an extension of myself, but a lot of people don't look at it like that at the same time. People put on personas and fake who they are so it doesn't have to be real to them. There's nothing you or I or anyone can do about that. Just have to brush it off and move along onto the next thing. This is the internet, get ready to meet a lot of people who ultimately won't care about you or your feelings.

1. People often lie. No one is obligated to believe what you tell them without proof. From their perception you're taking an easy out, lying, so they'll go lenient on you. That was their perception of me.

2. I've been on the internet since 1997. I'm aware. That's honestly more just a facet of life, but it doesn't mean I have to accept, endorse, or enjoy it. Be the change you want to see in the world or some shit.