I am having a big headache to try to choose the server, because there is other player with the same character name.

There is a way to know if the server you are going to enter will be the same as other player with same name?
We will be noticed if other player in other server will go to the one we wish?
I want to talk about this with that player but I'm unable to do that, hope this issue is taken in mind.

I want to choose the server with my friends, but also I want to keep my identity without have to change my character name.