Tales from Duty Finder: Some make you laugh, some make you cry. Let's vent.

[HyoMinPark]

Good thing he was 66 and could use the level 66 vendor gear!

If he was in i270 Shire, that’s more than enough for Bardam’s Mettle. No need for level 66 vendor gear when the i270 Shire or even i270 from Shisui is enough for the dungeon. If you were talking about Doma Castle or Castrum Abania, then I might be sympathetic. But this was Bardam’s... Most people did Bardam’s in Augmented Shire or a mixture of Augmented Shire/74 HQ when it was relevant.


EDIT to come after an EDIT:

Regular shire.

While still less than ideal, no need to be as rude as you were to him. Your tone wasn’t exactly hospitable.

All in all the healer took it the wrong way, and shouldn't have left. Like I said in my other post I had another healer in full scaevan wipe us 3 times on big pulls. No, I didn't stop pulling big on that one either. This healer could actually heal, I just needed to be less conservative with my dcd and just popped it all. I wasn't "rude" I was just giving advice.

And your tone was rude—at least, that’s how I interpreted it. You literally said “this is your fault” after a wipe. That’s not exactly nice, nor is it in any way “giving advice”. You can give advice in a far more pleasant manner (e.g., “Your gear is a bit weak. You can get better gear from the vendor located in Reunion, and that will make healing easier for you in this dungeon and later ones”). Saying “this is your fault” is not constructive, and it is rude. And a poor choice of words on your part. I’m honestly surprised you weren’t vote dismissed, because the chat log does not depict you in a good light.

You also could have adjusted and not pulled as big if the healer couldn’t handle the pull. I get it: small pulls are boring. But you work with your party. Not against them. If a healer can’t handle the large pulls—due to gear or inexperience—you should always try to work with them instead of basically making them feel bad. Some of the pulls are brutal in Bardam’s even for geared, experienced healers.

My advice to you: work on your phrasing/tone. And your team player skills.

[Rakshazi]

Titania Normal. Three tries to kill her, no new players.

Try one: We sort of, kind of limp to the add phase. A few deaths from . Adds go wild, somehow the tanks realise they need to be picked up. BRD thinks using the LB on the small adds, in spite of it looking like we'd need the healer LB3, is the best course of action. Big adds are not tanked at all, so they start picking people off. Tanks are told to pick them up. Whatever, reset and go again.

Intermission one: Hah. No, nearly instant pull.

Try two: First phase is a little better, no random deaths aside from the AST running into pink markers. Little adds are picked up by the WAR, but both tanks still think Mustardseed is their priority. Whatever, it's normal, the adds don't get Vuln down. Big adds are still not picked up. Big adds still. I bluntly state that the tanks should not be on Mustardseed (since they don't seem able to juggle picking the adds up with doing DPS).

Intermission two: One tank finally asks what they should do. They then proceed to ask what the big adds are. Finally, we get to the source of the problem and have fixed it. Hopefully.

Try three: Actual kill, but the time it took to kill the big adds made it look a bit dicey. Follow this up with the ground being set alight both times Flame Rune was cast, because stacking with the party in the water is so passé. Moving to where the Frost Rune will hit last? Unnecessary. Healers adjust. By the end of it, everyone but myself and one of the SMN had at least 2 Vuln stacks.

Still, DNC is quite fun.

Don't even remind me about Titania, please...

Be me: forever tank, going for the Titania 1st time.
Be not me: bunch of a people who qued also 1st time for the same trial.
It starts. Being forever tank valiantly (pfffff, valiantly... HAHA!) choose myself as MT. Going in, dodging all there is, quickly undestanding the mechanicks, 1st part is done. ADDs part... This is where all gone south VERY FAST. Second tank would even CONSIDER to switch tanking skill on and protect the healers and the DPS. We wipe, because, naturaly, I can't myself tank all 3 adds TWICE. I ask this person to tank at least one of the adds so we could survive. He/she/it says "Ok'', the second attempt...
Long story short, even considering it was a bunch of 1st-timers, like me, they don't dodge ANYTHING, they MISSED the DPS LB on the adds TWICE. Healers (somehow unimaginable) die in the star-like AOE of titania and etc... It took me 4 different groups and about 10-ish attempts to pass this trial. Bless the randoms...

[ForteNightshade]

How exactly are facts "rude"? He wasn't ready for the dungeon, he should have better prepared before trying to ruin other player's experiences. I came prepared, the mentor came prepared, so why exactly can't the healer come prepared - while playing such a critical role? I will not change my playstyle to baby a player who refuses to actually prepare for the dungeon they are queuing for, and actually this healer healed well all things considered. I had a healer in full scaevan do worse, same class. We only wiped once, all I was saying was he needed to get new gear. I wasn't being "rude" at all.

I did more actual "mentoring" than the mentor.

For example, when I am severely undergeared on a class because I leveled it through HoH or something... I don't queue dungeons I am not geared for! If I want to do a dungeon I will think of others and come prepared!

I am probably one of the biggest advocates for mass pulling, however this is arguably the worst way to go about it. All you've accomplished is likely making a potentially nervous healer even more terrified they'll make mistakes. Good job. If you want to incentivize players step outside their comfort zone, you do so by making them feel they can mess up and the party won't eat them alive for it. Not only did you repeatedly blame the healer for your own obstinacy but made the dungeon take far longer by getting into a silly bickering match with the other players.

By the way, Shire gear is perfectly fine for Bardam's Mette. As others have pointed out, Shisui drops i270 gear. Why would anyone assume they needed to upgrade again when the dungeon prior already gave them an upgrade?

[DarkEiraStar]

How exactly are facts "rude"? He wasn\\'t ready for the dungeon, he should have better prepared before trying to ruin other player\\'s experiences. I came prepared, the mentor came prepared, so why exactly can\\'t the healer come prepared - while playing such a critical role? I will not change my playstyle to baby a player who refuses to actually prepare for the dungeon they are queuing for, and actually this healer healed well all things considered. I had a healer in full scaevan do worse, same class. We only wiped once, all I was saying was he needed to get new gear. I wasn\\'t being "rude" at all.

I did more actual "mentoring" than the mentor.

For example, when I am severely undergeared on a class because I leveled it through HoH or something... I don\\'t queue dungeons I am not geared for! If I want to do a dungeon I will think of others and come prepared!

Unless they were in normal shire gear, they weren't under geared. Bardam's mettle is the first dungeon that would even give upgrades for augmented shire gear. It's more than likely that the changes to tanking in Shadowbringers is what caused the issue, especially if the tank doesn't know how to use what limited CDs they have.

[SturmChurro]

Unless they were in normal shire gear, they weren't under geared. Bardam's mettle is the first dungeon that would even give upgrades for augmented shire gear. It's more than likely that the changes to tanking in Shadowbringers is what caused the issue, especially if the tank doesn't know how to use what limited CDs they have.

They were in regular shire, and I know exactly how to tank these dungeons. i "adjusted" by using more dcds than necessary on that pull I have done countless times before.

I am probably one of the biggest advocates for mass pulling, however this is arguably the worst way to go about it. All you've accomplished is likely making a potentially nervous healer even more terrified they'll make mistakes. Good job. If you want to incentivize players step outside their comfort zone, you do so by making them feel they can mess up and the party won't eat them alive for it.

Nope, if you baby them they will never improve. You prove to them they can heal big pulls they will feel more comfortable doing it later since they actually have done it before.

[LalaRu]

That "Nope. I only pull big." made my day.

You are PUGGING and you need adapt to whatever player RNG gave you. This is casual gaming and I cannot believe you expect being paired only with savage-ready (or alike) players when you queue a DF roulette.

It is best you keep your requirements for your party finder.

[HyoMinPark]

Nope, if you baby them they will never improve. You prove to them they can heal big pulls they will feel more comfortable doing it later since they actually have done it before.

If you berate them into the ground, they’ll never improve either. Telling someone “this is your fault” after a wipe won’t help them improve. Harassing them over their gear won’t help them improve. Especially if this is a newer player or a newer/nervous healer.

Everyone learns differently and at different paces. I learned to handle large pulls on a healer fairly quickly. On the other hand, I’ve known healers that learned to handle them very slowly. It’s the same with tanking: I’m a nervous tank, but I learn to large pull gradually as my comfort level rises. Others just jump straight into it. You can’t always go balls-to-the-wall with stuff like this. And adjusting to what your party members can handle isn’t babying. It’s being a team player. Your “nope I only pull big” comment is just you refusing to adjust and work with your party. Nothing more, nothing less.

I’m all for people improving themselves, but if you think what you did will help this healer, I think you’re mistaken.

[ForteNightshade]

Nope, if you baby them they will never improve. You prove to them they can heal big pulls they will feel more comfortable doing it later since they actually have done it before.

Uh, no. This is like throwing someone with a fear of snakes into a snake pit. You aren't helping them, you're traumatizing them—especially when you then proceed to berate them for not being able to handle it. I usually do mass pulls but if we wipe, I'll either ask if they want to try again or pass it off like it isn't a big deal. That isn't babying people, it's helping them ease into something they may not be comfortable with. You don't tell a nervous tank "pull everything in existence and hope you live!" It may be easy for you... however if they're on the verge of panicking... all you've likely accomplished is shying them away further. The same applies to healers.

[SturmChurro]

If you berate them into the ground, they’ll never improve either. Telling someone “this is your fault” after a wipe won’t help them improve. Harassing them over their gear won’t help them improve. Especially if this is a newer player or a newer/nervous healer.

Everyone learns differently and at different paces. I learned to handle large pulls on a healer fairly quickly. On the other hand, I’ve known healers that learned to handle them very slowly. It’s the same with tanking: I’m a nervous tank, but I learn to large pull gradually as my comfort level rises. Others just jump straight into it. You can’t always go balls-to-the-wall with stuff like this. And adjusting to what your party members can handle isn’t babying. It’s being a team player. Your “nope I only pull big” comment is just you refusing to adjust and work with your party. Nothing more, nothing less.

I’m all for people improving themselves, but if you think what you did will help this healer, I think you’re mistaken.

No, they need a dose of reality. The gear disparity isn't as bad as the tank I had the other day in the same dungeon, but it is still there. Telling the healer "it's okay, just keep trying" isn't going to do anything, that's why there are so many bad players in this game. The dose of reality is the wipe was caused because of them and they should know it. I should not have to use every single one of my dcd's to prevent a wipe (and I had to the second time). I'm just being matter of fact about it and not prettying up my words.

This tank:

Uh, no. This is like throwing someone with a fear of snakes into a snake pit. You aren't helping them, you're traumatizing them—especially when you then proceed to berate them for not being able to handle it. I usually do mass pulls but if we wipe, I'll either ask if they want to try again or pass it off like it isn't a big deal. That isn't babying people, it's helping them ease into something they may not be comfortable with. You don't tell a nervous tank "pull everything in existence and hope you live!" It may be easy for you... however if they're on the verge of panicking... all you've likely accomplished is shying them away further. The same applies to healers.

There is a saying "face your fears".

Hmm so shire gear is fine for Bardam's Mettle as long as you're lvl 65 and not 66?

Should have been wearing shisui then! (or upgraded it)

[AikenDrum]

Good thing he was 66 and could use the level 66 vendor gear!

Hmm so shire gear is fine for Bardam's Mettle as long as you're lvl 65 and not 66?