What turned me off from FFXI:
1. Having to learn spells from random drop scrolls or buying them off the AH
2. The graphics look horizontally stretched
3. Dragoons have pets
4. Elitist
5. Economy is bad
6. Ninjas (unintentionally) make better tanks than DDs.
What turns me off from FFXIV:
1. Until level 25, the best way to get XP is by grinding.
2. The storyline is spread a bit thin and hardly helps in leveling up, so between each set of story content (for the mainline, non-GC story at least), it's broken up by long stretches of grinding
3. Levequests are the main source of income rather than story-driven quests
4. Crafting is fun at first but quickly turns just as boring as DoW/DoM grinding
5. Lack of social interaction
So between the two...I'd say stick with FFXI if you don't mind missing out on the chance to give feedback/experience once-in-a-lifetime content.
EDIT: Also ToR is meh IMO. SWG Pre-CU was way better

My favorite MMO ever.