Is this truly wrong?

[ChaoticCrimson]

Hey Kaiva, I can understand how you feel since I've recently been in a similar position getting the hang of SMN as well. Personally, I think you're probably being a bit hard on yourself. I haven't gotten to play with you much but I could tell you try your best. Lately I've been trying to remind myself not to be too hard on myself while I'm still learning and getting better. I was a wreck starting out with challenge content as SMN while I was still really fresh to the job, but with some work and support from my FC I've been gradually working past that(granted, I'm still kind of fresh lol). I'm a PS4 player, so FFlogs isn't something I'm going to actively pursue. But out of curiosity I did check and found some people upload a few things for me. Despite that, I'm not actually concerned much with the rankings I have as I'm still a long way from having BiS gear and it would be silly to worry about my DPS being compared to players who are more experienced and have such gear at their disposal. If you're feeling burnt out on DPS, it's probably not bad to step away for a little bit to play something you're more comfortable with. But I definitely encourage you to keep practicing SMN! I'm actually about to start working on O7S this weekend with my static, so I'm just about caught up with you. I say let's give it our all! I think you still have my Discord, so if you ever feel like comparing notes I'd be happy to oblige when I can. Don't lose heart!

[HyoMinPark]

Kaiva, as you know (since I have mentioned it before), I am in the same boat as you where I tend to care about my parses a little too much, and that (combined with other factors such as a toxic static environment) served to cause me to quit raiding entirely for an entire month. Even now with semi-dipping my toes back into it, I experience a lot of hesitancy: not just about the environment itself, because I do not want another static to just implode or become a cesspool of hostility stemming from one person that snowballs onto others; but because I also over-analyze my own performance, and always have.

Something I think is very important to keep in mind, the tier is progressing. The fact that you have reached 50th percentile is great, especially since you are competing against SMNs that have their BiS, and you do not (I’m assuming you’re probably in a mixture of 350/360 gear, yes? Maybe a few pieces of 370 if you’ve gotten some drops?). Another thing you should consider are the party comps in which you’re in. Do you have an AST that is buffing the raid with cards? What about a NIN that provides TA every 60 seconds? Do you have a BRD buffing you with their passive critical hit up trait and Battle Voice? A DRG with Litany? If you are present in groups that are missing a lot of key rBuffs (“meta buffs”, we’ll call them), then your DPS is automatically going to be lower than SMNs who are present in groups that provide them with rBuffs.

Another thing to consider is that you are still fairly new to SMN, if I remember correctly, yes? You cannot expect 95th percentile play on a job that you are relatively new to, are still learning the ropes of, and have not dabbled much in Savage with.

Your willingness to push yourself and constantly strive for improvement are excellent mindsets to have. Just do not let the parse ruin the content for you. Do not let it get you so down that you absolutely feel like you’re the worst player in existence. This is coming from someone who went from a 90 in Demon Chadarnook to the next parse uploaded being a 52 on a job they consider their main, and who hung their head in shame about it until they considered (or, well, had it pointed out to them by someone with far more patience for analyzing an upset situation lol) the factors that lead to that 52:

—It was a couple weeks since my 90, so there are more parses there; just like there are more parses for SMN now
—I am competing against BRDs that have their BiS, where as I still have mostly 360 left side and a 350 body; just like there are more parses out there of SMNs with BiS that you are competing against
—I did not have a DRG, and that was easily -500 DPS there alone from not having Disembowel; this is somewhat similar to how, if your comps are light on jobs that offer optimization buffs, that your DPS would be behind SMNs that have those buffs present during their runs...though SMN does not suffer nearly as much from lack of a DRG as BRD/MCH does, but I won’t get on that soapbox in here

Not being hard on yourself, or not feeling like you’re regressing when you don’t see noticeable improvement, is extremely hard to do. But you have to keep trying, or else it will just ruin Savage for you. Take it from someone who has already let it almost ruin the content for them. Focus on clearing, focus on learning more ins and outs of SMN, and focus on trying to get your BiS before you start worrying about those little numbers. You have my Discord if you ever want to speak privately to me about things. I don’t think that you should give up on SMN and opt for something “less DPS intensive” such as a healer because you think you aren’t good enough, or because your parse isn’t purple/orange. That is also coming from someone who has considered switching to healer because they dislike their own main’s parses (for performance reasons, and because I hate how reliant BRD is on having a DRG to have their full potential), and from someone who has not received an orange on a job they have played in Savage content for SB’s tiers, and the latter end of Creator.

Let’s focus on not focusing on parses together!

[Paladinleeds]

Now our static does have someone with a parser (but it's not me). However, they don't really put the numbers up. I may start getting them to put numbers up after raid, so people can see their performance, but I'm looking to step down as leader due to communication issues. That being said, I would need a leader who can take a situation and look at it in a way that supports the person (I have a very impersonal approach to communication, which has caused more than a few arguments, so I don't want to be in charge of the static for that reason, need someone better at communicating than me.) But my static's approach would be to encourage and push people forward, rather than punish people (my friend got benched from a static because she wasn't hitting enough DPS, whereas my static took her on, but an argument between me and her caused her to leave, she's since quit the game).

Tips from me are:
Focus on retraining yourself to be less harsh about your performance
Set more realistic expectations for yourself (welcome to my world, where I felt I had to get perfect play with every OCD perfectly timed, with 0% overhealing, as well as say 7'000 DPS, to be considered acceptable, not even good. I was that adamant about it a Facebook group started calling me a troll, which resulted in me asking one of the mods to ban me from the group, which they did not.)

[cardgrey]

not the same game i know but this vid should hopefully make u laugh and feel better
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xXqWGDsv52Q

[KageTokage]

I really wish FFLogs didn't exist, because it makes me feel as though I'm constantly under pressure to perform flawlessly in savage when I'd normally be able to just be happy with something being dead. I find myself being bothered by even small mistakes like missing a GCD while Trick Attack is active lately.

Simply clearing OS8 period likely means I'm able to perform at a higher level then the majority of players, but people aren't satisfied with that and have demanded that I show them my logs before they queue for some reason.

[Kitfox]

... I took some time to work on SMN and 'git gud'...

You say that but I took a look at your logs and you basically have no idea how to play SMN, at least based on the most recent log I found (April 4th). You won't be able to keep up with others if you don't even know how to do your basic rotation, much less be able to do it perfectly while under pressure in live encounters. Practicing a lot won't make a difference if you're practicing the wrong things after all. The good news is that it's easy to fix!

I suggest you join The Balance Discord SMN channels for the most recent theorycrafting, gear and rotation information. After you know what to do, you can practice doing it well. Good luck on your journey!

[KaivaC]

snip

My point is thus proven. I keep regressing and it just becomes more irritating. Even when I think I'm doing good, I'm playing like this and it's quite irritating. Not directed at you, but some may mock me for getting incredibly depressed over this, but this is what it is. Somebody earlier said 'welcome to reality'...this is my reality. Getting this upset and irritated over something as dumb as what is being recorded on fflogs...but this is what my reality is like. One thing I will never be ashamed of is being honest about myself. If I say I feel like I'm regressing...well, I have provided proof of what my 'progress' looks like after nearly two weeks away from the forums to work on it.

[KaivaC]

It's gonna get a bit difficult to respond individually, but I will try my best.

snip

That's essentially what I'm doing right now. I'm going to focus on WAR, and that's that. After I get it geared up...who knows. But that's where I just stand right now.

snip

Yeah, this is one (of a few) primary reason why I've been sort of radio silent. I just believe I need to be on the same level as peers and forum posters, otherwise what's the point in playing - that's my mindset when it comes to raiding. Is it enjoyable? Hell no, I'd be lying if I said I was having a blast because then this thread and the other would not exist. When I wasn't tanking, I was practicing SMN based on advice I was told, and what I've read thus far. I'm more irritated now than I was a few weeks ago because despite all the wealth of information I've been given, it's not paying off. I'm not improving at all and its to the point that I just stopped DPS'ing entirely...whether that's permanent or not depends on how whimsical I'm feeling.

There are times when I wish I didn't know about FFLOGs. This is one of those times, if I could be honest.

[NephthysVasudan]

<snip>

You want my honest advice?
Stop using it.
Take a break....focus on just the game..enjoying it...playing it as good as you know you can.
Don't obsess over numbers.

This is why I refuse such tools...its a trap. Even others I've known to use it are dropping them....its just toxic to yourself and others around you.
What it comes down too is if you give a damn...it will show in your play style. Once you know what you need to know...numbers are nothing...its just practice...and will power.
As I've said to others...already know I suck....numbers won't change that. All I can do is keep trying. :P
*Love your new image on your sig btw <3 *
And for crying out loud..remember you're human. You will make mistakes. People who forget this are better off leaving.

[Granyala]

A good portion of us here on the forums look actively seek to improve ourselves, whether its be min-maxing, figuring out optimal rotations, etc. After my thread in which I found out that I was, at best, a 9th percentile raider, I took some time to work on SMN and 'git gud'. Managed to hit that 50th percentile bracket...only in sigmascape normal, and it looks like I've just gotten worse as a player trying to get better. I'm not satisfied with being a 50th percentile player, because that's actually worse numbers wise amongst Savage raiders than what I was doing back when I started that toxic elitist thread.

First of all, please read up on mathematics and assess the logging sites in order to understand how these percentiles are derived.

You will quickly notice that FFlogs does NOT take item level into account (for a long time WoWs logging sites also did not do that).
Next up, please realize that the top parses are done by people that AIM for parses and have the support of bored raidgroups that have everything on farm.

As such, unless you wear BiS and are in one of these groups it's virtually impossible to get a 95%+ log.

That being said: if we're not talking about wipe tries (long inactivity crashes your DPS) or a bloody novice stepping into a raid for the first time, 9% or even 50% is BAD. If you and your group play well and you are not too far behind gear wise, you should get some score around the 80% mark.

That being said: Remember that FF-XIV is a "mechanics first" game. It is rare that you are allowed to ignore a given mechanic, soak the damage in order to maximize output.