LGBT-friendly servers & FC's for raiders

[Bluevann]

People get uncomfortable with others' sexuality only when this is flaunted or brought up a lot. Avoiding certain custom emotes, or certain comments does great strides in keeping people together. I speak as my own self, but I'm personally bothered by all kinds of sexual comments/emotes/interactions, so maybe this is what will bring people away from you. How do people even figure out your sexuality, if it didn't come from you in the first place?

Keep that stuff private, whether you're straight, gay, bisexual or transgender, it doesn't matter. /tell exists for a reason. I'm not saying that you need to hide from the masses, but just from a purely speculative point of view, I cannot tell LGBT from straight people unless they do something that calls for people's attention to themselves and their tastes.

Be appropriate, be polite, and be reserved. No one will be uncomfortable at you then.

I fully support your community but I just am not fond of this insula-mind people have. I do not think there is a need to make "X only" groups or Free Companies. Surely there are bad people there and trolls, but they are always a minority. And the first way to make it difficult for people to accept your diversity is to put this kind of barriers between you and them.

[Elim]

Not going to hide that I'm gay because it makes bigots feel uncomfortable. Straight guys don't hide that they're straight... ever.

The straight guys in my FC talk about hot chicks, I talk about hot guys. They laugh. It's whatever. My FC is small though. We only have two raid groups. But there are tons and TONS of final coil groups on Gilamesh. I haven't come across any bigots on Gilgamesh either. It might be a good place to transfer to.

[auronrenouille]

Bluevann: You fail to understand. The last tank that we had made a number of anti-LGBT jokes and I was faced with the situation of either telling that person to behave appropriately and resultingly making an issue of members' LGBT status, which was until that point unknown to the group, or quietly letting him tell hateful jokes. It's not a situation that I ever want to be in again.

[Siwy]

I think we've got a LGBT FC on Brynhildr that's been advertising pretty heavily. I'll check them later once maintenance is done to see what the FC's name is.

[Bluevann]

Bluevann: You fail to understand. The last tank that we had made a number of anti-LGBT jokes and I was faced with the situation of either telling that person to behave appropriately and resultingly making an issue of members' LGBT status, which was until that point unknown to the group, or quietly letting him tell hateful jokes. It's not a situation that I ever want to be in again.

Again, I'm going to say what I would do in your stead, as I myself never had this kind of issue, but I had something close to that, being Italian and having had someome make very racist comments in my Linkshell. First off, I'd privately contact the leader of your free company and ask for a mature solution to the problem, because if this tank has made "a number" of jokes that offend you, then it is an enough "number" to call this a problem.

This is where my experience stopped, because it's where my problem was solved. The offender apologized and stopped the racist jokes.

If however this hadn't worked or the leader shurgs the issue off, then the next person you want to look for is a GM. Discriminative jokes are bannable harassment, and as such you are totally entitled to seek the support of a moderator.

I'm not even going to address those who said I'm implying to "hide" because in my very own post I said that is not what I meant. But what I am ultimately saying is that in this MMO your sexuality does not matter. As doesn't your religion, your race, your gender, your food tastes nor your favorite boyband. When people begin to harass you for one of these things, they are trying to make it matter, and that is their wrong doing. By encouraging "X only/X friendly" servers, groups, cliques, and so on and so forth, you are saying that those things do matter. You are making a point of your offender. It's like saying "I'll go over there with those people because you are right, I am not legitimate to stay here". Is that the right thing to do? I say, no. Isolation and rising fences are the first weapon against acceptance and embracing diversity among each other.

Do not punish yourself for this person's behavior. They are the ones in the wrong, and should be treated as such. I am a girl, of a different race than the server I play on, asexual and a misanthrope to some degree. I'd be well screwed if I were to build a group to perfectly fit my canons because of the whole range of jokes I could be addressed with, but I have found my good share of friends, all of different tastes, nature, and beliefs, but we get along equally by not offending each other's qualities/beliefs/etc. and not imposing our own. If someone does, than he is the one to be punished, not ourselves.

[GalkaBikini]

There is a large amount of homosexual players on Midgardsormr. I'm not particularly aware of any FC or LS there, but there probably is one. I myself am gay and lead my own FC, and we have (and had, people who no longer play) several gay males in our FC. I don't think we have any raid slot openings though.

However, you mentioned getting offended over jokes or words or whatever. I'm not sure how exactly to describe my FC members, but we're the type of people that would pretty much REFUSE spending time out of our lives CHOOSING to be upset over jokes or words. If any sort of slur was ever said (which rarely if ever happens anyway), I'd expect no one to think anything of it. We are always joking around with each other and making fun of one another. Sometimes those jokes are related to our sexuality, or race, or gender, and that's OK (for us). Enjoying ourselves and having a good time is the #1 priority.

Now if someone is intentionally trying to upset you, or maybe even singling you out and purposely causing you grief for ANY reason, that's a different story. Either way, I hope you find what you are looking for, because being uncomfortable around people, especially ones you have to be around nearly everyday, is no way to play the game or to live life.

[auronrenouille]

Thanks, Galka, I struggle with how much to share here. I don't want to re-litigate the matter because that doesn't contribute to our goals in-game, but we're all accustomed to jokes and we all make them - what was being said was of an unusually graphic, violent, and disturbing nature, of a level I've never heard before in my life and that I hope to never hear again, something that I couldn't relate here even if I wanted to due to the ToS, not just the sorts of run-of-the-mill chat and trash-talking that I'm used to as a longtime online gamer. I agree that nobody can be an online gamer and have a thin skin, but the situation we went through would require far more explanation (and strategic redactions) than anybody would want to read here.

[Taika]

what was being said was of an unusually graphic, violent, and disturbing nature, of a level I've never heard before in my life and that I hope to never hear again

I hope you (and everyone else who may have shared the chat channel) reported the person.

[GalkaBikini]

what was being said was of an unusually graphic, violent, and disturbing nature, of a level I've never heard before in my life and that I hope to never hear again, something that I couldn't relate here even if I wanted to due to the ToS, not just the sorts of run-of-the-mill chat and trash-talking that I'm used to as a longtime online gamer

That's something I forgot to mention in my post, is that there is absolutely a line that people shouldn't cross, and thankfully I've been blessed with free company members who don't cross it. Sadly the internets is full of line-crossers, and people whose existence revolves around getting a rise out of people. :\ That's one of the things I vowed to protect my FC from when I created it.

[SekhmetM]

LGBT communities are a joke. I hear nothing but the funniest conversations when people talk about Cactuar's LGBT linkshells.

It's a constant war on who's character looks more homosexual and sexy. Then they get into full on arguements and spew outrageous statements Tumblr-style about who is more the victim. I can't even tell if it really is a LGBT linkshell. They demean themselves more than any of the non-LGBT players would to them. They've segregated themselves only to give themselves even more of a bad name.

In my opinion, nobody cares who you want to sleep in bed with. This is a video game. An ONLINE video game. If you just play the game you're fine. There isn't any reason why you should bring up such a topic. There isn't any reason why your sexuality is an issue unless you plan on dating some of the people in the game.

In the game "The Sims", the reasons why Will Wright designed the Sim characters to speak "Simlish" was because it not only allowed easy localization of the game to other countries but it also gives the player the effect that self-insertion is never truly possible for the game. The Sims are wacky. I think that applies to all games. In other words, don't take the game so seriously. Don't LIVE through the video game. It's not real life.

Really, if harassment is that much of an issue you should just report the other player. Harassment is harassment, and no harassment is tolerated. In this case, the GMs are very quick to respond.

What's the point of an online game anyway if you're going to alienate yourself from most of the community?