A Lesson in Tactfulness

[Sakuraluna]

"There's always a polite way to get your point across" someone once said and yes, if you just have to be catty/snarky/mean to someone you can still do it in a polite way.... if you've got the wit for it (see what I did there? )

Honestly I'd have more respect for someone to just be truthful and put it all out there if they absolutely had to be rude. Passive-agressive tactics just strike me as attempting to be dishonest on top of being catty, never mind tact.

[HakuroDK]

Honestly I'd have more respect for someone to just be truthful and put it all out there if they absolutely had to be rude. Passive-agressive tactics just strike me as dishonest on top of being catty, never mind tact.

Tact is honesty + politeness. Rudeness leads to defensiveness. Yeah, it's not the most direct way of conversation, but I wouldn't call tact passive-aggressive, dishonest, or catty. Those are their own things. If anything, tact is more... diplomatic. It's being honest, but using the proper phrasing to soften the blow while still getting the point across.

I mean, many interactions between members on this forum are a pretty clear example of how an absence of tact isn't very effective at stopping toxicity.

[Sakuraluna]

Tact is honesty + politeness. Rudeness leads to defensiveness. Yeah, it's not the most direct way of conversation, but I wouldn't call tact passive-aggressive, dishonest, or catty. Those are their own things. If anything, tact is more... diplomatic. It's being honest, but using the proper phrasing to soften the blow while still getting the point across.

I mean, many interactions between members on this forum are a pretty clear example of how an absence of tact isn't very effective at stopping toxicity.

I understand what you're saying and I agree completely with you. What I was replying to though was the "if you absolutely have to be rude and catty", which to me says "passive-agressive thinly veiled insult" not "diplomacy". I would say that tact is more an attempt at giving constructive criticism while making a conscious effort not to come across as hurtful, rude, or catty.

Of course I could have read his comment wrong, but that's what I took from his wording.

[HakuroDK]

I understand what you're saying and I agree completely with you. What I was replying to though was the "if you absolutely have to be rude and catty", which to me says "passive-agressive thinly veiled insult" not "diplomacy". I would say that tact is more an attempt at giving constructive criticism while making a conscious effort not to come across as hurtful, rude, or catty.

Of course I could have read his comment wrong, but that's what I took from his wording.

Ah, I can see how you may have read it that way! My apologies for butting in!