Post your tanking derps and herps here!

[AlrikRouge]

Just remembered this one from early on:
Newer tank and still to dungeon runs. Speed runs I not only had no real clue but kind of under geared. Start WP. Ask if we should try for a couple mobs or the whole thing. Someone said do the whole pull; don't stop. (Keep in mind...I was NEW and "pull" didn't mean much to me).

So, I grabbed the first set of mobs and second. Guy said, keep going, do the whole pull. I didn't know exactly what he meant, so did the "whole pull". Everything. To the first boss. After coming back alive, the BRD was frustrated and didn't want to wait so started off without the healer so went with him and again wipe. Sigh.

Totally had no clue.

[Niamh_Felixis]

First time I run Brayflox and keep eating last boss frontal attack. LNC is shouting that I should run left and right all the time to avoid it, but I still eat it and die. LNC takes over as tank...and avoids all frontal cone attacks. Rest of party takes out boss while I lie dead. Felt very ashamed.

Running Cutters and final boss isn't going well. Both DPS are down and the WHM is OOM from trying to save them. Boss is on about 5% life. WHM shouts that I should LB and kill the boss myself. I realize that I haven't even put it in my toolbar...

Running Stone Vigil and I have no idea why I'm having trouble holding agro.
WHM politely asks me 'So, what do you prefer, shield oath or sword oath?'
Realise that I haven't got either one up...

[Makato]

After about two weeks straight of throwing my face at Titan EX, I finally get a group together that consistently makes it past the add phase. We work at it for a couple hours, a few people say they have to leave, so we get one more try.

Titan is down to about 5-10% HP, MT goes down to a Mountain Buster. I pop Tempered Will, I tap L1 to switch to Titan to Provoke him. Instead of provoking him, I run head first right off the edge. I had let go of the damn trigger too early, so L1 just starts autorun.

[Versiroth]

I've been trying to get my first Garuda Extreme win for a week or so now and last night, I join a PF group and it's going great. I'm OT (On Chirada) and we have Garuda down to maybe 20%. The (likely) final twister phase starts and the Spiney goes to the MT. Not wanting him to have to eat 2 DWW, I grab Chirada, run to my corner and then try to provoke the spiney (in hopes that provoke would be available again so I could grab Suparna after Chirada dies). Well, while I was provoking the spiney, I lost Chirada to the bard and chaos ensued. We wipe and everyone is yelling at me. I apologize and we try again... only this time, the Satin (which I was attacking as off tank) plume in the first wave of plumes explodes and puts everyone to sleep. That oddity on top of me already being flustered from the previously screw up, I forget to switch to Shield Oath (I was in sword to help kill the plumes) as the sisters spawn. That same bard pulls hate and we wipe again. I apologize.. again, but it's really too late. We tried one more time and we wiped again (luckily, this one wasn't me...). Everyone leaves and I'm sure a lot of that PF group now hates me...

On a more happy note, I got a group of FC members up after that and I OTed my way to my first GX win. So, the day wasn't a total loss.

[Truefaith87]

Used to doing BRD for FC BC statics, but needed a replacement tank this week.. Go in, everythings going beautiful, reach Cad really quickly. First attempt goes half decent, split early, had a stack on split, wiped. Second attempt I'm fully buffed, preparing for pull, pop old LB bar since its gonna vanish anyways, run toward Cad, throw a tomahawk, all the sudden my eyes glance up onto my buff bar.. And Defiance is missing from it. Before I could utter the words "OH FU-!" He was making a beeline for Eos, who decided to heal really early. One Hoody later, both healers, 2 ranged DPS, and an OT were all on the floor.A conclusion was reached within 20 minutes of entering BC, and it was something that I couldn't argue with.. "Tama is never allowed to tank on a workday again."

[Ehayte]

The other day I was using my WAR to tank some stupid treasure maps for a few people in my FC. After confidently chattering in vent that I could easily hold enmity over our i88 BLM as a i79 WAR, the first set of mobs spawn and turn out to be the set of 8 ghosts. Confidently, I swagger over to the set of mobs, not realizing that I had my second hot-bar queued up instead of my first, the intended chain of attacks was to be:

Overpower > Infuriate > Steel Cyclone > Berserk > Overpower > Vengeance > Overpower > Bloodbath

Instead, I stumble up to the mobs and do the following, while simultaneous saying "Watch this!" In vent:

Brutal Swing > Holmgang > Sprint > Nothing > Nothing > Foresight

... FAIL

[Bixby]

Instead, I stumble up to the mobs and do the following, while simultaneous saying "Watch this!" In vent:

This reminds me.

My push-to-talk key for Mumble is Ctrl.

My Tomahawk key is 8.

My Sprint key is Ctrl+8.

One of these days, I'm going to remember to change this.

[soopadook]

Yeah sure we're the stalwart guardians of the party and we protect the squishies from harm but we're also human too and humans tend to derp a lot.

So this is a fun thread for all tanks who've ever derped with a little herp (or alot) to share their stories.

I'll start off, I was tanking titan and I knew something was a little off due to how low my HP pool was and I realised I was tanking without defiance after the wipe we had previously and forgot to turn it on... I noticed this at the last 25% of the fight, props to my healer for keeping me alive the whole time haha.

If i had a nickel...

[Avenol]

Ifrit EX, last set of nails. I'm working on hitting a nail down a bit, see the MT is at 2 stacks, I run back over and we get prepped to swap.....and then I provoke the nail under Ifrit...DERP!

[TaintedSpud]

Crystal Tower. Spending most of the trash pulls DPSing, we get to Thanatos. I'm in Alliance B. After we get the buff, I run in to taunt Thanatos off of A's tank. After taking a few hits, the healer (one of my guild mates) in mumble wonders why my HP is so low.

It is then I realize... I never put Defiance back on.