Listen, I know it gets used as an excuse way too often, but this genuinely sounds like 100% what I used to deal with in WoW PUG raids. And you did say this was your experience recently. Has party finder always been like this? From the little bit I've heard from people who have used it, it was mostly positive.

But one person watching what everyone else is doing like a hawk and constantly complaining about it in chat sounds like word for word exactly my experience in WoW lol. I guess we'll see if things improve when the new WoW expansion comes out or maybe, sadly, the FFXIV might just be like this now, I hope not.