Well, number 2 is fairly irrelevant, as the only people who can tell that you DPS has dropped by whatever small amount are those that run DPS parsers, which you can report anyway if they start calling you on it.

But sure, the rest I understand, it's called the logic and circumstances of PuGs. People who don't know or understand each other trying to comprehend and control others playstyles. Not that I play a BRD at all ^_^