For the most part, I'll agree with pulling large is the way people "expect" tanks to play, but if I'm not the tank of a run, I won't hold against those who don't.
And I also think that any DPS that thinks they know better, and pulls things that a tank tells them specifically not to, does not deserve to be saved from their own arrogance. I've only needed to say "Don't pull until the current mob is dead" once, and I have no regrets on leaving them to their own demise for acting anyway.
