Part of knowing your job is managing your enmity on any role
I hate to say it, however someone has to. Knowing your job is more than just gearing and using CD. There is a reason why there are support jobs that can transfer or diminish enmity generation either by actions or role traits. As a tank it's rare that I have enmity issues at all if anything I normally take enmity without really trying. Gear is only part of it. As a tank you can request people's assistance or even ask for tips. As long as your doing your best most will try to help. Sure you will be open to be criticized for it, however there is no shame in learning. Keep in mind that the majority of players are casual and most hardcore types are less likely to listen.