The bullying on these forums is concerning

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Originally Posted by Juzjuzz

Well troll or not idk, but if see a lot if ppl against 1 dude right now. Even if he is attention seeking : the guys i see making fun of him in this thread are no better.

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Dang man, idk his post history, but some of these people should lay off.

the thread tags doe
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EblHOEAXQAQMCjo.jpg:large

Based on the tags I've concluded either OP has been broken, or this is a years long plot to perform a high tier troll. Either is possible.

I remember when a certain group was trying to push cyberbullying as something super duper bad back in the 2014-2016's and no one gave a shit so they just changed the buzz word to harassment because it made better headlines.

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Originally Posted by Shibi

A lot of the nastiness is something to do with a certain troll. Usually he is incredibly easy to see, Roe-daddy, level 80 healer, level 2 gladiator, Birth month 1, in a FC with just the one member. All DoH/DoL classes at 80 except the fisher at 1... Like: https://na.finalfantasyxiv.com/lodes...cter/35187131/ as an example.

So, please. Stop demeaning Damian's thread with fake pity. Trolling him isn't nice Drakonik/Titanmen.

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Pretending to be a victim of bullying is not nice either. It is very disrespectful to anyone who has actually been bullied and cut from societies for reasons that were not in their control - race, gender, social status and etc. Why are you asking others to be respectful towards one person who is disrespecting so many others through his actions?

Fake pity is what people who pretend to be victims deserve. When they learn to be genuine with ppl then they can expect something more.

I'm still waiting for the hentai in the tags. WHERE IS IT!?

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Originally Posted by Roeshel

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You've missed a layer of sarcasm that may become clear if you compare who he is speaking to and who he is describing.

It's not about bullying but more the lack of moderation on the forum.

There are new provoking or misleading threads every day and no one stops them.

If we had a moderator who takes a daily look into the forum and straight up just closes them and banns the "trolls".

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Originally Posted by Curisu

It's not about bullying but more the lack of moderation on the forum.

There are new provoking or misleading threads every day and no one stops them.

If we had a moderator who takes a daily look into the forum and straight up just closes them and banns the "trolls".

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Prettymuch. We need a moderator who watches the large scale of what's happening on the forum and can recognise patterns of behaviour, not just judge a single isolated post. Give warnings, lock threads if they're getting out of hand, make sure people understand the rules. Literally, moderating the discussion.

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Originally Posted by Iscah

Prettymuch. We need a moderator who watches the large scale of what's happening on the forum and can recognise patterns of behaviour, not just judge a single isolated post. Give warnings, lock threads if they're getting out of hand, make sure people understand the rules. Literally, moderating the discussion.

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They need to do that, but also let the right amount of tensions happen. Not all tensions need to be dealt with, because a little bit of natural tension that goes away on its own is absolutely healthy. I agree with what you said though. It's time that the moderators step back into the forums.

The question is, will they? Many years ago we had a forum crisis where they weren't do TOO MUCH, so they took a step back, and that was basically fine for awhile. People applauded it, but now that isn't working. The fandom has got way too big for that.

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Originally Posted by DamianFatale

They need to do that, but also let the right amount of tensions happen. Not all tensions need to be dealt with, because a little bit of natural tension that goes away on its own is absolutely healthy.

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Of course - it's still a forum debate. People are going to take sides. It's a moderator's job to step in when it stops being civil and/or people are being disruptive, not just because people are disagreeing with each other.

maybe we shouldn't have a forum at all.

Maybe people should not get so easily offended or having their feelings hurt by words from faceless entities on the internet.

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Originally Posted by Awha

Maybe people should not get so easily offended or having their feelings hurt by words from faceless entities on the internet.

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I am offended that you are not offended.

Maybe we should all learn telepathy :rolleyes:

If you can't discuss or have difficulties by doing so, the forum isn't your place to be. If you want to learn, then you gotta toughen up and accept that some minorities come up with harsh words.
Some people aren't worth your time, they don't want to be convinced. That's when you need to learn, the person ain't worth your rare lifespan.
A moderator shouldn't be there to protect you from evil lurkers. Just my 2 cents.

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Originally Posted by xbahax92

A moderator shouldn't be there to protect you from evil lurkers. Just my 2 cents.

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No, a moderator is there to shut the whole thread down because they've seen what went on in the previous threads and can judge that it's going to be nothing but drama from the start*. And half the people driving it should have already been banned due to necroing threads and generally all-but-declaring they're sock puppets of the ongoing troll.

* and that's regardless of whether the OP is genuine (and thus opening them self up to further attack) or trolling.

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Originally Posted by Iscah

Prettymuch. We need a moderator who watches the large scale of what's happening on the forum and can recognise patterns of behaviour, not just judge a single isolated post. Give warnings, lock threads if they're getting out of hand, make sure people understand the rules. Literally, moderating the discussion.

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This times a billion.
The moderating being inconsistent and just a matter of luck actually makes it feel worse than no moderating at all.
Because it's like yeah, the mods exist but they ain't doing much and when they do something it's like '' *facepalm* you moderated this one comment but not *ALL* of this? ''.

Would it be considered bullying if once Data Center travel is available, I went to Crystal (blegh..) just to PK OP in PVP? Assuming he does some PVP.

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Originally Posted by WoW

Would it be considered bullying if once Data Center travel is available, I went to Crystal (blegh..) just to PK OP in PVP? Assuming he does some PVP.

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In their eyes probably would say it is a targeted assault on them due to a personal bias and actions go beyond what a reasonable person to constituent as acceptable.

Just my guess. :P

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Originally Posted by WoW

Would it be considered bullying if once Data Center travel is available, I went to Crystal (blegh..) just to PK OP in PVP? Assuming he does some PVP.

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Does anybody even actually play PvP in this game? I'd love to camp some open world spawns and kill players, but that's just not a thing here. Nor would it be worth it trying to get into a frontline to do it, those are a complete mess, in my opinion.

I need to side with the Topic Creator despite whatever history he has, the bullying on here has gotten out of hand and it always seems to come from the same posters that tend to get away with a lot of their comments.

It looks like in-game is a source of bullying too! I just got out of a DR where a player threatened to kill the whole raid "if someone doesn't voke", and when I suggested that doing so could get them reported.. I was the subject of directed profanity, and when I told them that was also a reportable - even bannable - offense I was told to "shut up", I was subject to even more profanity that I cannot include here! It is quite unacceptable behavior, I have to say.

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Originally Posted by SturmChurro

It looks like in-game is a source of bullying too! I just got out of a DR where a player threatened to kill the whole raid "if someone doesn't voke", and when I suggested that doing so could get them reported.. I was the subject of directed profanity, and when I told them that was also a reportable - even bannable - offense I was told to "shut up", I was subject to even more profanity that I cannot include here! It is quite unacceptable behavior, I have to say.

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And you reported? Making them 33% closer to being banned forever?

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Originally Posted by ICountFrom0

And you reported? Making them 33% closer to being banned forever?

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Nope. I've never reported anyone in-game, I was simply saying that saying things like that could get them reported, and even banned. Maybe they should think about potentially being 33% closer to being permad, before they bully someone. I am a very nice person.

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Originally Posted by Kaliesto

I need to side with the Topic Creator despite whatever history he has, the bullying on here has gotten out of hand and it always seems to come from the same posters that tend to get away with a lot of their comments.

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I would like to see these people as almost no one in the forums can get away with saying some ignorant shit without being absolutely destroyed by 1 or multiple replies.

Probably just a difference in opinion on what "bullying" is.

Some people think they are being "bullied" because they see disagreement and believe that's an attack. Which it's not. Disagreement != Attack

It's true some opinions are so far out of the mainstream, and sometimes you don't even know if someone is trolling thinking one is a prime number.

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Originally Posted by technole

Some people think they are being "bullied" because they see disagreement and believe that's an attack. Which it's not. Disagreement != Attack

It's true some opinions are so far out of the mainstream, and sometimes you don't even know if someone is trolling thinking one is a prime number.

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I don't think Op, has an issue with disagreements they even state so that disagreements are fine, but labeling and ganging up screaming those labels and posting memes to try to set someone off isn't disagreement that boarders on harassment. Idc if you feel like a person is this or that with your label don't go screaming them because your little mind can't see outside the box or think in complex future ways or have odd thoughts that has to do with the game..

I looked at OPs post history, sure those things are a bit odd/outside the box but honestly there is nothing wrong with having a civil discussion about any of them

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Originally Posted by SturmChurro

Nope. I've never reported anyone in-game, I was simply saying that saying things like that could get them reported, and even banned. Maybe they should think about potentially being 33% closer to being permad, before they bully someone. I am a very nice person.

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Not trying to be mean or anything so I apologize if it comes off as such, but not reporting someone when they're obviously being offensive/threatening/etc. is kind of an indirect way of saying "This behavior is okay."

People aren't going to stop and think about whether they should act a certain way tbh. They'll act however they want to because it's a game and they never have to deal with anyone they're attacking irl (unless someone goes postal and stalks them but that's a whole other thing). So, if someone is being obviously hurtful towards people and threatening to party wipe till they get their way, it's kind of warranted that they get poked by a GM to be like "Hey yeah, can you not?" It might not change the behavior but it's better than letting the person think that what they did was okay since no one did anything about it.

These forums are remarkably tame compared to many I've seen in my time.

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Originally Posted by LianaThorne

Not trying to be mean or anything so I apologize if it comes off as such, but not reporting someone when they're obviously being offensive/threatening/etc. is kind of an indirect way of saying "This behavior is okay."

People aren't going to stop and think about whether they should act a certain way tbh. They'll act however they want to because it's a game and they never have to deal with anyone they're attacking irl (unless someone goes postal and stalks them but that's a whole other thing). So, if someone is being obviously hurtful towards people and threatening to party wipe till they get their way, it's kind of warranted that they get poked by a GM to be like "Hey yeah, can you not?" It might not change the behavior but it's better than letting the person think that what they did was okay since no one did anything about it.

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I get what you are saying, but when I run into people like that I often just tend to forget about them. Why bother putting any extra effort to remember the actions and report said actions of a single ant.

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Originally Posted by Awha

I get what you are saying, but when I run into people like that I often just tend to forget about them. Why bother putting any extra effort to remember the actions and report said actions of a single ant.

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If they get banned, they might be inspired to some introspection. If not, then they will continue to do what they've been doing.

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Originally Posted by Misplaced_Marbles

If they get banned, they might be inspired to some introspection. If not, then they will continue to do what they've been doing.

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Working on a lot of “ifs” and it could go the other way, if they get banned it may emboldened them to do more. End of the day I have no control on the actions of another person, though I can control how someone’s actions effect me. Sure I may report someone for something if it got to me, but it does take a great deal for someone to get under my skin. I generally do not see much payoff in taking the time to report the actions of others. If others do cool, that is good on them.

Out of all the tags, why Mexico?

Can't quote a specific argument in the above thread, but regarding "report them or they won't learn their lesson" if they are being an awful person, all punishing them will achieve is to make them more careful about how they go about how being awful. Punitive reinforcement really only creates better psychopaths "I was only punished because that person was too thin skinned."

Much the same way as I tend to watch my language since I got a temp ban (I try not to be offensive, but I can be quite crass. I may have also told someone they were being a... err... donkey.)

That said, I don't have a proper solution, and ignoring the issue doesn't help either. The proper solution would be to show and reward good behaviour, but outside commendations, which are borderline useless, there really isn't a mechanism for that.

If the vast majority of people you interact with are aholes, maybe the problem is you and time for some self reflection.

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Originally Posted by DamianFatale

replying to original post in thread

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When you ask them not to, that just further fuels them. It's sad to say, but it's how some people work. They do need to tighten down a bit more on the forums as well. There are some things that people are quick to call 'bullying' when it's either someone showing tough love, or just flat out not agreeing to what someone else thinks.

One of the issues of a forum is the fact that there's no context, and sometimes people are quick to apply what they think if the context the other person is speaking, leading to people getting a bit hostile.

But if people are going out of their way to harass you, which I am seeing in this thread, your best bet is to report them any time they try to aggro you and just don't give them the time of day.

Also it doesn't hurt to ask a friend to look at stuff along side you/at what you're posting cause I've had friends before call me out for being too aggro as well. But to be totally blunt here, you don't have too thick a skin and like others have said maybe you should step back from the forums for a bit, you have taunted others before on the forums and with people seeing you do that, they want you to do it more and are willing to press all your buttons. It'll do you some good to take a step or two back I personally believe.

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Originally Posted by SturmChurro

Nope. I've never reported anyone in-game, I was simply saying that saying things like that could get them reported, and even banned. Maybe they should think about potentially being 33% closer to being permad, before they bully someone. I am a very nice person.

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I am not sur I count you as nice.

By not reporting them, you left them free to turn that outrage and hate on somebody else, while letting them think they are allowed and encouraged to do it.

https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_0HHLRGMB...HERIFF%2B8.png

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Originally Posted by Kaliesto

I need to side with the Topic Creator despite whatever history he has, the bullying on here has gotten out of hand and it always seems to come from the same posters that tend to get away with a lot of their comments.

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Originally Posted by Bacent

When you ask them not to, that just further fuels them. It's sad to say, but it's how some people work. They do need to tighten down a bit more on the forums as well. There are some things that people are quick to call 'bullying' when it's either someone showing tough love, or just flat out not agreeing to what someone else thinks.

One of the issues of a forum is the fact that there's no context, and sometimes people are quick to apply what they think if the context the other person is speaking, leading to people getting a bit hostile.

But if people are going out of their way to harass you, which I am seeing in this thread, your best bet is to report them any time they try to aggro you and just don't give them the time of day.

Also it doesn't hurt to ask a friend to look at stuff along side you/at what you're posting cause I've had friends before call me out for being too aggro as well. But to be totally blunt here, you don't have too thick a skin and like others have said maybe you should step back from the forums for a bit, you have taunted others before on the forums and with people seeing you do that, they want you to do it more and are willing to press all your buttons. It'll do you some good to take a step or two back I personally believe.

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so in a sense, you're saying that people should stop calling trolls and drama seekers out? because that's what 90% of the so-called-bullies did, independently of each other
even now, with this thread active, the OP goes into other threads and thoroughly enjoys the victim complex he has created for himself, or, if we're generous, his complete lack of self-awareness and his abusive behaviour
https://forum.square-enix.com/ffxiv/...=1#post5581209

so again, you're asking people to just be okay with manipulative trolling when they have made inflammatory and very controversial posts and topics for half a decade because they say that the people who have enough of that behaviour bullies?
I'm very sure you people know what real bullying is, as you've either seen, experienced or read about it first hand - and this isn't it, not even cyberbullying because not a single person is going into threads to insult him or follow him in game to harass him - and yes, he said several people did just this, apparently

just look at beginning of his thread: drakonic straight up quoted multiple of damien's own posts and you can't tell me damien didn't realize it - yet he played along - even though some of these posts were aimed AT damien a DAY before. no one has a memory this bad, especially when that 'bullying' is supposedly affecting him so much
you're doing everyone that has ever gotten bullied or is still experiencing it a huge disservice by defending people like him