On a serious note, if this game is causing you that much anxiety, it might be best for you to not play. I don't say that to be mean or insulting. MMO's require thick skin. I've seen people like you before who get anxiety just from going into dungeons. The fear of judgement from strangers keeps you from enjoying the game, so why play a game you can't enjoy? It's best to rid yourself of the things in life that hinder your enjoyment, and that includes games like this. Just my two cents. I mean no offense.
Everyone really hates me for not be the best player
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05-20-2017, 02:09 PMwhiteblade89
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05-20-2017, 02:12 PMGilded
I'm curious as to how far people's patience can go here.
@OP, I'm seeing words of encouragement and tips here, but in the end you're the only one who can begin the steps to improvement. -
05-20-2017, 02:15 PMMomomiMomiMy patience is infinite!Quote:
Originally Posted by Gilded
...but I also have other things to do. Bye bye! -
05-20-2017, 02:17 PMdlgc
Now, assuming you are not trolling and genuinely asking for help:
There is really only one issue that needs to be addressed before we can do anything else.
"Do you really want to be helped?"
Imagine that you are drowning, players are throwing ropes at you to pull you out of it, however it is ultimately up to you to grab hold of the rope to save yourself.
We can only help those who are willing to help themselves. Otherwise, everything we say/do is redundant.
Cheers,
D. -
05-20-2017, 02:23 PMAma_Hamadayes and no. You said you played all 3 roles right? Just go in as w/e you are most comforable on while you have a friend or 2 go with you. No don't solo heal you made that part clear already that is an issue, that is why I said in my first post "Get a friend or 2 (preferably a healer that you know is skilled) and just have them walk you though it. If you are on dps, you alone can't wipe Alexander - The Cuff of the Son. You have to remember there is 7 other people in your group."Quote:
Originally Posted by UNDEAD10000
I do not know data centers where does Cerberus and balmung lie? (asking anyone not just to tc) -
05-20-2017, 02:29 PMYitharV2I'll admit that this is actually me as well since I have social anxiety. That's why I generally tend to queue with a friend. It's far less stressful. I think though I'm at an okay anxiety level, considering I have wiped the whole raid in Weeping City on both tank and DPS (i was really tired at the time), so I know that sometimes crap just happens.Quote:
Originally Posted by whiteblade89
In a previous MMO, I think what happened is I just did dungeons enough with my friends to the point where I really knew what I was doing so I didn't feel any anxiety. -
05-20-2017, 02:31 PMYitharV2Cerberus is on Chaos. Balmung is on Aether.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ama_Hamada
http://arrstatus.com/ -
05-20-2017, 02:32 PMMomomiMomiBalmung is Aether.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ama_Hamada
Cerberus is Chaos.
Ninja'd! -
05-20-2017, 02:35 PMAma_HamadaNice my server has the worst picture -.-Quote:
Originally Posted by YitharV2
(also thanks momomi, ps, lol@quotefail)
EU server i see hmmm....................
(anyways this person tends to miss if on old page so)
gtgQuote:
Originally Posted by Ama_Hamada
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05-20-2017, 02:39 PMTransient_Shadow
In all honesty the DPS community in this game is Toxic. I hate using that word but its true. I've asked for help several times on my build only to be ridiculed for things that are "common knowledge" to older players when I've only been playing for a short time now. Your not the problem they are. Just do your best and try to find a friendly player who can show you the ropes of your job.
People like to talk shit if your not already at ilvl 270 but thats just not reasonable. And neither are big pulls or speed runs anymore. The devs are phasing those out and hopefully the toxic players with them. -
05-20-2017, 03:09 PMLunaFayeOP is in full ilvl 270 hence nobody takes him/her serious when asking for help. The community might be toxic on some servers more than others, but still not the majority, we do need to keep that in mind.Quote:
Originally Posted by Transient_Shadow
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05-20-2017, 04:15 PMSigiria
http://i2.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/...9/OK_thumb.jpg
Also if you're trying to get ban because of a bet or any kind of stupid reason you can just post the picture of Yoshida showing his rings... Worked for me and it was just a joke. -
05-20-2017, 04:20 PMYitharV2Because this is a Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game? It's possible to progress through just using DF and PF without actually making any friends, but that's definitely not the most optimal way. Friends generally don't care that you're bad as long as you're doing your best. I think it could really improve your situation in-game if you just made some friends.Quote:
Originally Posted by UNDEAD10000
The thing I like about MMORPGs is that you can meet so many people, who may live miles away from you. I think it's somewhat of a waste to not make friends with anyone in this world. Sure, they might be random people at first, but so what? -
05-20-2017, 04:36 PMYitharV2Well no I'm not saying that, and you probably wouldn't walk up to a random person in real life and just ask them to be your friend out of the blue with no context. I mean, you can, but it's probably a good idea to have some sort of standard as to you are friends with, rather than just being friends with anyone. Like if I like someone's attitude in a dungeon, I may add them as a friend.Quote:
Originally Posted by UNDEAD10000
My recommendation is you find a good helpful Free Company and make some friends there. -
05-20-2017, 05:18 PMSilkaN
Somehow I feel like organizing a
clearcarry party so that these threads finally stop.
But then, one day later, we would see threads like "I can't beat Alexander - The Arm of the Son and everyone hates me". -
05-20-2017, 06:16 PMShaneDawn
>Random rant about everyone "hating" him when they don't
>Gets a lot of encouraging posts that try to help the OP
>Shoots each and every post down while continuing this mindless ramble
>Gets more encouraging posts
>Says that already quit the game because everyone "hates" him so
Must be a troll or just a lost cause in general. If this is a serious post, I don't even know how you managed to turn any positives in this into negatives, but you just did. -
05-20-2017, 06:41 PMSpookyGhostTbf, that's how depression can work. You can block out all the positive and only see the negative. Unfortunately all the advice in the world won't get through to him if he's not willing to take it in. It could also be that he's young, I know that I was way more confrontational when I was in my teens. Either way, as much as a lot of us would like to help him, it's up to him to make the first step - we can't do that for him. If this game is too stressful, I'd recommend just quitting cold turkey (aka not visiting the forums and unsubbing) and playing some fun single player games. Multiplayer games like this can make you feel like you need to perform to a certain standard, but in a single player game it doesn't matter if you mess up because the only one who can hold you accountable is... well, you.Quote:
Originally Posted by ShaneDawn
Also, as a side note, I really hope they expand on the trials of the novice in SB and I really wish they'd make it a requirement. It'd give new players a controlled, safe environment to practice before heading into real content. -
05-20-2017, 07:03 PMAldoraThis is basically all there is too it. Since we are all human beings, we make mistakes. But, we also learn from them. The amount of effort you put into it will determine the quality of skills you learn and speed in which you learn them. We must not lose sight of the fact that we should not be scared of making mistakes. How else will we be able to learn from them?Quote:
Originally Posted by SpookyGhost
"Ones own mind can be their worst enemy."
But, it doesn't have to be that way. I can't remember how many times i thought to myself "I can't do this...". The moment you give up, that's gonna be the end of it. Another thing you need to understand is that you're not alone. There are so many people who've experienced the same difficulties as you have. It helps if you talk about the things you're having difficulty with. If the problem seems too complex, break it down into smaller bits.
Just... Stop working yourself up with this spiral of negativity. It's not gonna help you, but only make it worse. Take a deep breath. Relax. Clear your mind of all the problems you're dealing with and start from the beginning. Work your way up from there.
There is no shame in admitting that you are having issues with Alexander. Or that you are having troubles dpsing as a healers. I mean, since when did we have to be the best in what we do? As far as i can tell, there multiple levels of skills people can have, like:
- Best
- Exceptional
- Great
- Good
- Experienced
- Ok
- Inexperienced
- Learning
- Completely unfamiliar
- Lazy
- Unwilling
If you ask people around you, everyone will have a different opinion what it means to be "Good", "Great" or "Best". Someone with a high level of skill will tend to say that you have to match their skill level in order to be "Good" and that you're "Bad" because a healer doesn't DPS, A DPS that can't deal 2000 damage during an encounter or a Tank that can't hold hate. Nonsense…
People will only call each other “Bad” if they don’t meet a certain level of their expectations. But, why would really care about what they think? You need to feel good about what YOU have achieved, not what other believe you should achieve.
Every single player has to learn their way around the game. Some learn faster than others, but you don't have to be able to beat Savage to be considered "Good".
Think about that.
Strive to being “Good”, so that you can grow to become “Great” and end up being “Exceptional”. If that means, being able to clear Alexander - The Cuff of the Son, then that’s your goal. Just take one step at a time.
One final thing… You don’t need to have close friends playing XIV in order to have people to play with. You can make friends, simply by talking to people. Share stories and ask for help if you get stuck.
We’re out there and we’re willing to listen. -
05-20-2017, 07:46 PMSilkaNXDQuote:
Originally Posted by UNDEAD10000
/10char -
05-20-2017, 07:50 PMArielyanna
@OP : Numerous people have offered advice etc to help. You're looking at their responses (and more than likely this one) through a negative light and it seems, refusing to accept what is written here. I've read all 7 pages and not once have I seen someone say "I hate Yunao Arun/UNDEAD10000"".
If certain content is giving you grief, then simply don't do it. Work on something else and in FFXIV, there is a lot of other things to do, besides raiding (not that there's anything wrong with raiding either). If things get too hectic, take a break... play something else or read a book etc etc. FFXIV is meant to be played to get enjoyment and have fun. If you're having trouble with rotations or how to play as certain classes and if you're a part of a Free Company/Linkshell... ask for advice/tips. If people are rude and mean to you, simply blacklist and move on. Being called out for being bad hurts, but you should also consider this: Without being told what we're bad at, how can we improve and better ourselves? -
05-20-2017, 08:14 PMFaliandra
Guys...he has gotten several encouraging posts in at least 2 or 3 OTHER THREADS, even before this one!
I tried to give advice too....and my advice was completely ignored as well. That's why I stopped.
When you check his response, its always the same "come report me so ill get banned because ill never be as good as you".
It's like a record that got stuck and keeps repeating itself over and over.
Troll or not. This isnt a typical behavior of a depressed person.Quote:
Originally Posted by SpookyGhost
There are many mental illnesses that are accompanied by depressions, and this may be the case here...
(in which case the depression wont be the cause of this acting we can see here).
But a person suffering from depressions isnt gonna act like this, in public, in front of people they dont even know,
repeating the same damn thing over and over again. Maybe they'd speak up somewhere, maybe reach out,
but they'd just leave quietly if people were mean to them. Everyone is different ofc, but no, from various
experiences I refuse to believe that this associated to depressions. I suffer from depression and I have
seen many people suffering from the same and none of them acted even remotely close to this.
Bottom Line: let this thread die and stop giving him/her more attention. I repeat once again: check the posting history of said person.
He/she deleted many of her posts, but you should still see the actual threads that were posted in where several people tried to help.
This is a lost case, troll or not.
Please also keep in mind that we can't help someone who's not wanting to be helped. And if said person indeed suffers from
some kind of mental illness and refuses to acknowledge it, there is even less we can do.
Save your energy and time for someone who actually appreciates it... -
05-20-2017, 08:15 PMMature
Remember that ALL the people or the BIG majority of the FFXIV community are copy & paste of YouTube or Online guides.
Sadly this game FORCES you to learn fast or you will fall behind. People will never go blind unless the raid / primal hasn't been cleared or done.
So when they say to you that you aren't very good always remember that they started the same way no matter how 'pro" they pretend to be. (Specially those who are obsessed with FFlogs , who are another copy&paste of online guides) -
05-20-2017, 09:38 PMSpiritMuseI've actually seen exactly this before. On another forum that I used to frequent, there was this 13 year old who was very depressed. She kept going on, every time someone even remotely disagreed with her, about how we all hated her and she was sorry that she was so horrible and more of that kind of stuff. It wasn't true, of course, no one hated her, but she's 13 with no perspective on things. Eventually, though, her continued insistence that we should hate her started wearing on everyone else and she ended up creating a self fulfilling prophecy - by constantly insisting how we should feel about her, she actually got us to like her less and less over time. Until finally she left the forum (mostly because she had lost her interest in the forum's subject, though).Quote:
Originally Posted by Faliandra
We didn't want to dislike her, she was very sweet most of the time, but we just couldn't deal with constantly having to argue with her that, no, we still didn't hate her. It was sad, really. I hope she's doing better these days. -
05-20-2017, 09:41 PMYitharV2Yeah, I've been burned more than once so I understand that sometimes you can't help people. They need to help themselves. But even so, I think at my core I want to do what I can to help. It's probably why I enjoy support roles like healing and tanking.Quote:
Originally Posted by Faliandra
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05-20-2017, 10:05 PMFaliandraQuote:
Originally Posted by SpiritMuse
with all due respect, all i get from this story is "there was a 13year old acting the same way" without youactually knowing whether it was depression or not.
It's probably just something you assumed.
Depression accompanies many other mental illnesses, as a side effect. But depressions on their own do not cause
this kind of behaviour pattern.
the point is that several people tried to give input to help, and EVERYTHING has been ignored. Hence why I'm still not fully convinced its not a troll/attention seeker.Quote:
Originally Posted by YitharV2
And if youre gonna put effort and energy into helping someone....at least put it to good use on someone who wants to be helped.
Again, take it from someone who knows first-hand what its like. -
05-20-2017, 10:17 PMAma_Hamada
I give up, I can't tell if this a person with legitimate issues or a troll. I do not know how you can spin this amount of helpful posts into negative.
Are you for real? How ... can someone make a reply like this to what I said? I am baffled. I... am speechless, literally. How do I respond to this?Quote:
Originally Posted by UNDEAD10000
wait what? I had to look.. how can someone get a 275 relic as it requires to clear stuff.. and isn't some of the stuff harder then Alexander - The Cuff of the Son????????Quote:
Originally Posted by LunaFaye
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05-20-2017, 10:23 PMYitharV2Yeah, I know first-hand as well, so I'm not disagreeing with your point. I once tried to help someone make the right decisions, but in the end, they just did what they wanted, and made stupid decisions.Quote:
Originally Posted by Faliandra
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05-20-2017, 10:29 PMSkyriorPlease don't use the F-word. It's really rude.Quote:
Originally Posted by UNDEAD10000
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05-20-2017, 10:31 PMDreamAngel-RenNot everyone is a villain, buddy. Remember that.Quote:
Originally Posted by UNDEAD10000
I told you that you HAVE THE OPTION - THE FREEDOM TO CHOOSE to quit if trying is so hard for you. Mostly I was really hoping that you can try harder, but since you've already thrown in the towel, there's no point in that. I was only trying to toughen you up, but that didn't work >.>
My advice to you is don't let others influence your decision making and do learn to give people chances because with your attitude, people will never help you. It's sad, but it's the truth.
Good day to you. -
05-20-2017, 10:33 PMYitharV2https://www.reddit.com/r/ffxiv/comme..._weapon_guide/Quote:
Originally Posted by Ama_Hamada
1. FATEs
2. Mostly HW story dungeons
3. Beast tokens, Hunts, Lore, Poetics
4. Lore
5. Lore and Blue Scrips/Amber/Materia/etc
6. Lore, Leveling Roulette
7. HW FATEs, HW dungeons, etc.
8. ARR Trials + HW Trials
The only hard part I see is really the HW Trials but I'm fairly certain it's possible to be carried through them. At this point though, I wonder if we are getting trolled though. -
05-20-2017, 10:42 PMAma_HamadaI know that but.. read the bold XDQuote:
Originally Posted by YitharV2
If this person was a bad healer to cause wipes on Alexander - The Cuff of the Son, it should happen on the hw trials tooQuote:
Originally Posted by Ama_Hamada
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05-20-2017, 11:04 PMYitharV2Well I just looked at a guide since I only ran through it once when my FC ran me through A1-A12N. I feel like the HW story trials are easier at least. Zurvan normal and Sephirot normal are pretty easy imo. And Sophia normal isn't too hard either as long as people know her mechanics. I feel like there are less mechanics too? Because A6N has 4 consecutive bosses required for the clear.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ama_Hamada
I changed my mind. I don't think they're actually trolling. From my understanding, the best healers are the ones that can DPS well since they know when they need to heal. -
05-20-2017, 11:21 PMMysticales
Hey Undead, Come to hyperion, We can work with you and help you out in the FC.
No matter what your playstyle is, we have something that will work, even your combat. :)
If you do take me up on this, Look up Mystaria on Hyperion, youll see my company. -
05-20-2017, 11:42 PMAwful
It's a good thing we got a lot of doctors in this thread that can diagnose OP for depression, guess we won't need Dr. Phil at all.
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05-20-2017, 11:53 PMManuelBravo
First you shouldn't care what people think, it takes practice. Second as long as you let them know a lot of people will understand. Third, it's a game, if you enjoy it F what everyone else thinks learn at your own pace. I would just recommend knowing minimum the rotations, cross traits, and side steps.
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10-22-2017, 04:47 PMslaytanic_666
I know this thread hasn't been touched in a few months, but I'm curious...does anyone know what the haps is with Yunao?
I just made an alt on Cerberus specifically to find Yunao so we can both glam it up and be play together.
Feel like tracking me down? I'm keeping Yunaos legacy alive in Cerberus...
MY NAME...IS JUSTICE! (lol sorry just finished watching Death Note for the 2nd time and I really, really wanted to say that)
My name's actually Tiduso Arun.